Thursday, May 7, 2009

~~TiReD~~

Realy...realy...TIRED!!!
TIRED of everythg in tis world...
TIRED of thinking how to get back together...
TIRED of thinking wat shud i do to make u happy...
TIRED of thinking whn i shud say de right word..
TIRED of thinking how should i do so tat i can let u have back our last time de feelin...
TIRED of chasing u...
TIRED of juz me caring for u, while u juz doin nothg doesnt care...

When browse thru ur FB profile..found out tat act ther's so many thgs i missed in ur life d...
after i work...
Dear~~realy ma??Is my workin is an issue of our relationship getting worse??
I remember once dear told me it is...
If realy lidat...i realy rather dun1 to work to gt back our relationship...Is it too late nw?

I found out tat dear realy feel more happy being wit ur fren...
Am i acting selfish myself to keep on wan u to include me in ur life??
Izit all of these is my fault??
Am i realy nt a gd gf to u anymore...nt de person u cherish lik last time anymore...??

In ur FB u wrote very stress in ur life...
Bt u nvr told me about ur prob...although i ask..
Long long time d...v nvr chat about wat u thk,feel d??
And ther's many fren who cares bout u...
Mayb in ur life, u nvr really love tat person til de end...
and stop in de half way..let de others care bout u..
U und my feelin ma act??

Haih~~last week went ur hs..saw ur clubbing shirt...
I noe de...u went club..bt u say u din hav..juz go dakei n wear tat...
I choose to trust u...
Tis week..ystrdy...10 sumthg lidat... cal me...
den say u 1sleep d..
I realy feel happy at 1st..den ltr feel weird...
coz its Thurs again..
U wont cal me de if u wan sleep...bt ystrdy u cal me...den midnite i cal u tat time...
keep canot reach..coz network no good...
I dunno is u realy sleep or go Club again...
bt u cal me at 4 sumthg...seems lik after cub time...
Haih...duno la...izit evry Thurs oso wan me lidat...
Thk tis tat...I afraid of Thurs d...realy...
I realy wan to believe u de...bt gt 1time i saw ur msg flirting wit a gal named Cindy says tat u realy wana dance wit her de..bt juz tat she went other club...
u noe tat time hw sad i am ma??bt i tahan..coz v juz gt back..i dun1 quarrel..
REaly sad lo...

Even Sun is de day i hope it would cum...oso i dun care anymore...coz its juz lik same other day without u askin me out...although its my off day...
Last week i tot can spend de whole Sun wit u...bt end up...
u hav to go tournament n said i cant go..coz ur car is full...
If realy full can juz tel me on Sat nite..y hav to say i canot go..bt din gv me any gd reason...
n Sun morning oni say...I realy disappointed tatdy...

Even tatdy i wan to meet u,i oso hav to beg for it...u noe hw cheap i feel ma?
I noe u r tired...i noe...bt u noe y i wan tel u last min ma...
Coz i feel lik if i tel u earlier u wil say duno, see 1st...n mayb coz of dun1 meet me, go out wit ur frens...
Tis is hw i feel...y u cant try to und me??
I realy happy whn i wit dear...oni i can feel u act wit me...
Bt whn u're nt wit me...u realy NT wit me...
Nt lik last time d...although dear is far..bt i stil can feel u near...

Last few days...i hav nitemare dreamin tat dear is leavin me...
I keep cal up ur name...bt u oso dun1 to answer me...i juz c ur back slowly fades away...
I realy scare...n wake up to cal u..u answer de cal...n i ask u wher r u??
U tel me at home...den i ask again...u scold me..coz i keep ask...
Mayb ur answer is nt wat i expected ba...last time u will say...
"I'm here dear...dun scare k...dear here beside u"

Tis Few days i keep thinkin hw to let dear gt back last time de feel...
i stil gt 2day leave n realy wana spend it wit u...bt i dun dare ask...
I scare ltr i ask wat i gt is juz disappointment..
I realy gt plan de...bt...haih~~:(
Sun cumin...i noe dear tis week no tournament...
Bt i thk dear oso wont hope wan c me de la....
I oso dun1 force u to c me...as long as dear happy...i oso willing to sacrifice my happines for u...
Nowadays u oso wont cum c my profile d..wont leave any comment or msgs for me d...
Oni me..me oni will look...

My whole body really tired...physically n mentally...
Even my heart oso feel weak n hurt....
Pls cum n save me up...
I juz nid a huge big warm hug from u in ur arms...
Juz little care from u...pls..tis is wat i expect...
Juz take away all tis pain...='(

~~MaRiA~~

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