ღ WHAT I HAVE TO SAY ღ

Ran in2 HIM

2011-10-14T01:17:00.000-07:00

Never thought after a yr I would ran into him in a mall together with his other half...

Feelings was nt quite heal after all...Hard feelings still there...whn I saw her~~with him...

That time the feel is like..I wanted to see him yet I knew I'll sad if I saw thm both...

Whn I saw him...He was accompanying his gf shopping I guess in weekdays..

Wow..sounds great rite..she was so happy together with him...

He saw me..bt we jus silently say hi without his gf noticing...Thk bak I so wish I could have de courage to jus walk to him & say hi...to see wat's his reaction..

Bt...I didn't..& cant do it!!

Time flies, bt feelings nvr once gt fade...

Every time I pass by those road that we use to drove together, ate together, done thgs together...My mind automatically recalls about him...

Damn...I even went to the place we ate together for that day sushi promo..sittin back the place we sat..Drove to his hs...jus to see his corridor..

My goodness!!!Wat am I thkin??

Hell...this is all so bullshit!!

Come on Maria!!Wake up u bloody asshole!!Stop all this nonsense...

Focus on ur career nw..U stil gt whole lot of quota to catch up!!

Taiwan Bangcock..all waiting...ahaha...

*Pray* *Pray* wish all my quotation all come in sun sun li li...so I can hit my trip quota to Hawaii as well pls lord...=DD

Stress nvr leaves me...

2011-09-28T23:13:00.000-07:00

Today we just gt our emergency meeting...Sounds terrible...

Bt jus gt fuck from de division manager..nt a small nag!!Its a realy fuck ur ass to fire type...

Wat we do...look down & thk of wher we go wrong...

She says its nt de figure, its de performance..

Say I'm demotivated nowadays due to my working attitude & sorts...

They thought they put a gd impression & high expectation from me..bt..seems lik i disappointed them...& honestly I really did..I admit..

I don't know where is my passion already...

When starts seeing ppl can sign on de spot, suddenly I feel so stress...Why is all my proposal still cant come in.??

The scolding seems so rude till I feel so down...she says till like I'm ruin all de team...like fuck d become irresponsible...

It might sounds serious, bt it did will affect my manager performance at the end cos its in her quota already..=/

I realy don't know what I want any more at this moment,

Money??Status??

Maybe...both?? Argh...Life is always that hard to make decision...

Haih...bt de oni person I thought of whn I'm so damn down is him...

I rang him up, & he answers...we talked & we laughed..

Feels better after that...Thanks..

I knew he's de one who always make de day whn I'm down, Bt he's nt mine to share though...

Maybe in the future I'll find someone like you, bt this moment I still hiding my heart away to avoid disappointment...

R.E.M.I.N.I.S.C.E.N.C.E

2011-09-25T23:13:00.000-07:00

Melaka trip by AMK 1 at last....is successfully accomplished!!!!

After a long plan & de continuous postpone by various of reasonssss....

At last its accomplished with a 2D 1N short trip for the 12 of us...

Its a trip with full consumption on foodsss...what else rite beside the food...??

We're nt realy into the history or buildings though..ahaha.

Its for the gathering...& we started off with chicken rice for the lunch, cendol & Nadeje crepe cake for the dessert & end our dinner with Satay Celup...which I feel jus so so for the sauce...

Nite...we starts la with out drinking session with all de usual mates around...

2 bottles of vodka...sounds possible for us to drink all bt end up oni few are drinkin till late nite, till de last consciousness left in us...

Some are even tired / drunk sleeps so early...Bt...its a satisfactory nite I can say..with all de laughter jus like when we're back in UK...

Aww...I jus miss thos moments alot...=/

However, during this trip my mind seems like fully taken by the reminiscence of him...

I brought along 2 items which he gave me during our last visits 2 yrs ago..

The Hat & the Bracelet...

I dont know y, bt I jus did it...& yeah...I pass by alot places that we went b4 that time...

Places were still the same just like the past 2 yrs, bt jus the people I went with different...

Hmmm...Guess that's de oni thgs he left for me...=)

We end our trip with seafood at Damansara call Lala Cheung...

Guess we were too high expectation on this restaurant till we spend about more thn RM 400 here...

Some of the dish is so so so nt worth that price...

Bt overall its still a satisfactory trip & food....=D

Guess I'm gonna expect more of this kinda trip in the future...Taiwan trip they say...

& I wonder can I realy make it with al my commitments in hands now...Gosh....

Wishes everything goes well for me & hit my target kao kao for nxt yr Hawaii trip...=D

Energetic Work Mood

2011-09-19T23:37:00.000-07:00

Why I say that??

I realy dont know what got into me today...since morning till noon...

I'm so damn focus on my job like nvr b4...

Keep calling for appt, rushing my new sales in, calling all my revenue for appt...

Till I even don't dare to believe it's me doin all this...

If only I can be that energetic everyday...I would have alot of appt d...Zzzz...

Today I got to sign a customer on de spot...although its nt a big amount, bt its de satisfaction I gt by signing the client on de spot without follow up...

If everyday got this kinda cust...very fast I can hit my quota d lu...

But...dream can la..Hoping all de proposal I've sent bear some fruits for me la...pls come in..

Rely on u guys to hit my trip Quota d...=D

Sial??

2011-09-15T23:30:00.000-07:00

I dont know whether is me sui or am I realy that cha my driving skills...???

My mum was right, in not more thn 1 yr my working time I involve in more thn 5times accident.

3of it is kinda big case...& WTF!!! Evrytime I gonna come out $$ where I want to save it...

Realy FUCK IT!!!

The moment I bang, the 1st thg I thought about is my mum, nt my $$!!

Feel so sorry to her cos she realy took gd care of the car & once its in my hand, it ruined by me...haih..

Sorry alot mum...realy sorry...

Today...Fuck kao de lorry cos scratch & drag my car & also headlamp...

I was lik stunned & even forgot to honk him!!!

Arghhhh....He knew I thk..& he drove fast away...ARGH!!!realy du kao lan!!!

This time...Gonna come out $$ again cos de head lamp broken...n bend in...& also have to spray paint due to last time that accident...

Seems lik nt a smooth yr for driving me...once a mth sure once...

Almost head bang also the other day, lucky de car avoid faster...OMG!!!

It was freaking freaky!!!

Bless me...bless me...bless me...pls...

Meeting

2011-09-13T23:00:00.000-07:00

Since last time I don't even like this word MEETING!!!

It kills me inside out....

But...today I just went thru I thk de longest MEETING in my life I guess!!! 4hours in de morning + 2more hours in de evening...

Starts from 7.30am -11.30 am, from 5.30pm - 7.30pm.

The meeting for me is all about commitment that I have to commit for this whole canvass.where our team stand, individual position & sales update..

Basically I have to achieve about 330k in order to hit company quota & trip to Hawaii & additional KPI quota till 450k...Still wonder about my ability now.

I knew I'm not a person who will commit into something that I'm nt keen on for very long...& I started to feel bored in this job.

But when I thought of my manager & people who look at me & feel I'm thos success type of people, put hope on me, it stresses me...& I only have 1 choice which is to go on..

Like what my GM say, once you committed " You're just like a 8mth pregnant woman which must deliver the baby out"

Its kinda true though...

Always thought I never will went into sales field, bt at last end up on it.

But only sales field can give you the $$ which is more than just working a regular work, & I'm sure this company can give me what I want, with condition I fully commit into it & hit the sales quota.

However..in sales field its not easy to survive if you cant stand on the stress & I'm in one of the most powerful or I can say a very successful sales girl which very success & also set a very high standard on her division.

She realy got her way, that's y she have today. Must realy learn something from her personally to know her success secret I thk. =D

Hope I can realy got alot of real businesses comin in with dozens of proposal I've sent!!!

All De Best To Me!!!

Car Accident

2011-07-20T02:27:00.000-07:00

Today is realy a very very suai day for me...

I dont know is it I too believe those karma or wat...

Maybe yesterdy is Guan Yin Ma bday & I didnt go to pray or wat...cos I'm de "anak angkat" we say...according to Chinese believe...

Jus one second close my eyes cos I'm so damn sleepy...& there it goes...BANG!!! my car into de lorry back...WTF!!!! is my 1st word...Damn...

Lucky the lorry jus de steel break abit..& lucky the uncle is so kind he asked me to repair my own car & he repair his own...OOoo...Thank GOD!!!!

Once I bang in tat moment, al I thk of is only my mum...nt my $$...cos its her car...moreover I feel so guilty that I didnt realy take good care of her car...

If it's my car...I would have gone mad as well...

That's y I didnt blame her...

The bill was gonna be a burden again...no more savings...haih...

All I can say is sorry mum!!!I realy guilty....=(

My other 2 frens oso met in a accident today...almost similar as mine...

It's realy nt a gd day to drive....

Finally

2011-07-20T01:13:00.000-07:00

I make up my mind to tell him everythg I wanted...

& I got my answer...

It was kinda heartache at first when I open his profile & saw that I cant see his wall post anymore...

I knew this is de end...

I nvr regret that I've told him hw I feel...

Because with this action...I gt de answer...& leave me with no more guessing game again...

I'm glad...bt no denial tat I'm kinda sad as well...to lose this person who I once like...

& I realy feel like telling you..

"Thanks for all de wonderful memories, & I'm glad to have known u as a fren"

We will once again be 2 stranger who met but separate at last... =(

Met Him Unexpectedly

2011-07-03T06:20:00.000-07:00

Never in my mind, I tot will saw u at thos places...never even cross my mind...

What if u met de person u lik unexpectedly with his EX??

What u'll feel....???

Actually de feelin is familiar...bt yet...still hurts when I encounter it jus now...

He try to explain....bt wat more to explain??

I saw it all...

I jus wanted to HUG u & say I MISS u,

Bt she's ther...therefore i RESPECT her...

Nvrmind...mayb it's fated to be like tis...

Mayb it's fated for me to saw u & wake up..."dun dream again idiot!!!"

Everythg's fated....=/

Changes or Changed??

2011-03-18T06:15:00.000-07:00

Is it I'm de one who is changing constantly??

Or...U're de one who is changing??

Is it both of us has change??

Or...Is it our environment factor have changed us??

Clearly known that I myself keep insist believing its still exist yet in de surface,

it's clearly stated " Hello~~~dun u c de changes??"

De affections we once shared has gone,

De laugh we use to have had gone,

De passion we have for each other has also gone...

Watever we use to exp together seems nvr gonna come back again....

I jus cant stop thkin " things will never be the way they used to be" which hurt the most...

Which I have to slowly learn to accept the changes that is taking place...without crying....

We both know where our identities lies...

But I noe all tis while...I've been fightin for wat I love...& at least I fight for it...so I wont regret in de end....

And so be it...This is the answer...I learn to accept & move on~~

So sorry I've been appearing in your life...

I dont know whether I bring rainbow to your life...but you certainly makes my life more colorful with your existence...

I thank you for that =)

LIFE

2011-01-28T10:46:00.000-08:00

I always believe in this quote "Appreciate ur loved ones before they left u one day, and u have no chance to meet them nor tok wit thm de thgs u always wanted to say"

Grandma....was always just lying down on her bed since stroke last yr...She cant tok well, nor remember us clearly sometimes...

Stil remember last time whn she was stil healthy, she would have tok to me....bt im jus too busy wit my own thgs...not at home all de time....

Whn she ill, oso i seldom goin n c her o tok to her...

Today....early in de morning around 7.40 am when my alarms ring...i heard de maid shout to my parents say "ah ma sudah tidak bernafas"

Shock....i cal my sis n we went to her room immediately...

Bt...she already stop breathing...

Tat time... suddenly...I thought of alot of thgs I wanna tell her...bt...nw..I gt no chance anymore...

Den...REGRET tis word came about in de mind...

Shud have care bout her more,

Shud spend some time to listen to wat she wanna say,

Shud have visit her more even she's in de bed...

Shud hav tis...Shud hav tat...

Bt...so many shud hav...oso no more chance d...

Wat we wanna tel her...jus tell her thru de incense stick...wat de hell....

She pass away peacefully...Guess she already have her wish or unfinish business fulfill in this living world...& ready to cross over to another world...

Cousins and aunts start comin...whn starts to wear for her al de jewellery...people starts to cry...

Cant stand...oso cry out...

Ceremony was held....whole day was jus praying....and only can say...hope...

Ah ma....U'll have a better life in the other world....bless ya..n happy always...

I'm sorry to ignore u whn u're ther,

Sory that I nvr had de time for u,

Sory that I nvr visit u often whn u sick....

Sory for evrythg.....Bless you ah ma....

So peeps out ther, if u have any words or thgs u wanna say to them or do it with them, do it now!!!before u REGRET!!!

Dun wait till u nid to talk to thm thru incense stick....tat would be no meanin after all...=(

Quote of the day:-

People say you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone. Truth is, you knew what you had, you just never thought you’d lose it.

InspiRation-Everything Reminds Me of You

2010-09-28T20:43:00.000-07:00

One of the blog I saw from Owl city blog..meaninful and decide to paste it here...

Everything Reminds Me of You-http://owlcityblog.com/
On September 27th, 2010 by Adam Young

Dizzy.

That’s how you feel when you run into a significant other you haven’t seen in a long time. A bitter avalanche of icy memories plows into your chest at breakneck speed, stealing the very breath from your lungs. Gasping for air, there’s really no use fighting it; the blow is instantaneous and it’s overpowering. Your eyes land on this person, your heart immediately stops dead, your knees go weak and you internally panic. You force yourself to walk over, but before either of you say hello, you’ve already got an endless amount of things you secretly want to say and an equally lengthy list of questions you wish you could ask.

What affection the two of you once shared was absolutely beautiful, consequently rendering any unanticipated meetings thereafter twice as awkward. But as everyone always reminded you, life has a way of operating, God has a mysterious way of working, and sometimes things change without a moment’s warning. Even after it was all said and done, it’s still hard to imagine how things could’ve ever evolved from “always” to “never” in what seemed like a single dramatic heartbeat.

Months and months later, you run into this particular person unexpectedly and the realization hits you like a brick wall. The pain is still there. It’s almost as painful as the night you said goodbye. Enough time has passed to con you into thinking you’ve begun to heal, and of course you probably have, but then you see this person and suddenly those old familiar aches begin to hurt all over again. You were finally beginning to mend after what happened, the relationship withered and ended, however dramatically, but the moment you lock eyes with this person you once shared so many dreams with, your stomach turns and a bitter taste fills your mouth. You can barely breathe. Half of you aches for things to be the way they once were, the other half longs to forget the whole thing ever happened. Regardless of your role in the conclusion of the relationship, it left you shattered and bringing it up after all this time would only pour another dose of potent heartbreak for both of you.

So there you are, standing face-to-face, unsure of what to say aside from the typical small talk jabber. A myriad of emotions swirl through both your heads but they only make former lovers more confused. Maybe you hug an awkward I-haven’t-seen-you-in-forever gesture, but that familiar mixed scent of perfume and cologne makes it even more impossible to know how to act, brief as the impending conversation inevitably will be. You just can’t stop thinking “things will never be the way they used to be” and that’s what hurts most. You both know where your identities lie, Who ultimately claims your hearts and where your fortresses are… and those things are truly what matter most, but this unforeseen meeting is still severely painful and there’s no denying that. It keeps you both awake for nights.

As healing as it is, you can only drive around at night listening to The Swiss Army Romance so many times.

This is me being honest. I tossed and turned a lot last week. I thought about someone so much it was unhealthy.

So here’s hoping I fall asleep easier tonight if I send a simple message out into the void:

Boy,

I still care about you. I think about you all the time. I’m praying for you constantly. I want so badly to know you’re being taken care of. I wish you the best in life, not because you’ll surely find it, but because you deserve it. You deserve so much.

I just wish you knew how much I miss you.

Maria

I realy hope u noe Hw much I stil misses U...=(

C.o.m.e A.c.r.o.s.S

2010-09-08T01:00:00.000-07:00

Have you ever come across a person which he may leave a very deep impact on your life??
Almost immediately you feel there is no 1 else lik him d?
Unless that's him~Only that particular him can giv u this feeling.

Only him can put de smile on your face,
Only him can giv U de calm whn U needed it the most,
Whn U hear his voice, all ur stress automatically jus vanish, & smiles will be on ur face,
Whn U cal him, de conversation between both of U jus never-ending,
U hope it can cont forever lik tis..

Wherever U go, U jus wish that "How Good if He was here right nw".
Whatever U C, U wanted to buy him 1 as well no matter wat.
Whenever U are alone, U wanted him to be ther,
Whenever de phone rings, de 1st name u wish to c was his name,
Whenever U are, Ur heart jus keep thking bout him or sumtimes he may accidentally pop out..he jus gives ur stomach the butterly feeling.

Whn U listen to de song that use to be his fav, U jus keep play it in repeating mode,
Thking hw he say he lik de song n U jus hate it, bt nw u jus loves it, cos its his fAV~
Thkin back de joke he used to tell U, Pattern he use to show U,
U jus realy wan thos Scenario to happen again... But U noe al that would never could happen again~~

All U left nw, was only the memories he left behind for U, Kept tightly, deepy in Ur heart...
Open it whn U realy realy miss him...and den cry as hard as U can to ease Ur yearn toward him~ No 1 noes, no 1 sees, no 1 feel,
Only You alone knows it de best!!!

YES..I came across such a person, n he become a person that realy leaves a impact so deep,
I just couldn't rub it off~~
3months over, U found Ur happiness, bt I'm stil de same old me..missing You so badly~~ Guess forever U wouldnt know~:(

Time Flies

2010-09-07T15:54:00.000-07:00

Left 3more days before we officially say goodbye to Opal One,Sheffield...
Summer Gone...Autumn is here!!!^^
Feels lik it jus yesterday we jus reach here, everythg was stil new, we stil feel lik an alien to to tis place,
Bt nw we used to it d, we hav to say goodbye...
Tis place realy leave us alot memories....
Happy, Sad, Angry, 8gua, Gossip here n ther, n also a place wher we realy learn de darkest secret of the ppl we dun noe, or noe bt rarely und thm....

Today was de 1st final paper...n yet I got a feeling I'm gonna fail...>.<
I regreted i din study early for all de sub which make me din memorise de point...So heartache!! Bt..its over...its time to focus on another paper for tis thurs...
Jus now...All de unneccessary thg was pack into a box and sent back to msia...nw my room was lik so empty....
So reluctant to c it...>.<

I jus love tis room, loves here, loves de space, loves de weather..almost everythg bout here...
Bt sadly we cant stay!!!
Argh~~hoping we could stay longer....3mths...y it flies so fast....All De Sweet Puzzle Will Come To an End Soon~

Argh!!Jus dun1 leave here...:(

去年的这一天

2010-08-21T00:00:00.000-07:00

去年的这一天，这个时间，
我们还在一起谈天，谈的好快乐，
陪你度过你的生日～

我真的很很想念去年的这一天～
但我知道，你已经有另一半陪在你身边陪你度过这一天～
我祝福你和她永远的快乐幸福～～

Tis day 21st August 2010 n I'm here at UK thinkin back last yr tis day~~how happy we were tat time, chit chatting away in Steven Corner n only me accompany u to pass 12am for ur bday.
After tat u fetch me back n promise that we'll come out tomoro for movie which is de day we gt together in the cinema....watching District 9~~

I miss you,
I miss that moments,
I miss this day,
I miss evrythg bout you,
You were so perfect that I feel i was too lucky to have You,
But here I Realistically realize You're nt mine anymore,
You got sum1 else to accompany you to celeb ur bday d,
Everythg is about her already...

I giv up,
I let go,
Silently I cried,
Jus to pour out hw much i realy misses u al by myself!!

I tot tis few mths I'm here I tot i can toughly let u go,
and make it like I dun miss u~
Bt den I knew its almost impossible,
Everytime...no matter I sees a person personality similar wit u,
Our picture,
Your video,
Thgs u teach me,
Your fav thg,brand,
Automatically reminds me of you~
Tears will be at de end of the eyes....:'(

I never noe tat u'll leave such an impact on me~~
Till evrytime i starts to drop tears for u~~
Tis is hw much u impact me!!Its indefinite~~

No matter wat!!I stil have to accept the truth although it realy stab me fuckin hard on my heart!!
I cherish both of u to have happy live and live happily all the way~~

I ♥My Bdayyy ♥ =D

2010-07-13T19:13:00.000-07:00

Here's de best part....Its my bday & i'm celebrating it @ UK....hw great was tat???
I have nothg to ask that could be beta than tis opportunity to celeb here....

Gotta say a great great thanks to all my frens here who celebrated for me.....especially my dear dear fren TAN YOKE SAN who work so hard to bluff me...ahaha...thanks alot~~XD

Thanks to Evon, Kahoe, Heok, Kah Hing, David, Heng Siang, Lan ing, WK,L, JL...for de 1st party celebration....^^
We ate our dinner @Zing Vaa, a chinese restaurant where the rice is free flow....OMG!!its a great news for thos gentlemen...cos food is lik gold to thm...where they can eat unlimited rice....
De dish was awesome....^ I'm addicted to de "Pai Kut"...OMFG....Its fuckin delicious...argh....=D

After de dinner...thy wanna bluff me to Evon hs lagi...ahaha...I realy tot of havin a chat o sumthg...bt mana tau...go til de door ther....Blackcurrant cheese cake is waiting for me & thy sing Bday song.....
Ahaha....WOW~~~wat a suprise which i nvr expected...^^ TQ so much.....& oso de lovely pink pyjamas for my present.....I ♥ it la....!!!!!

Hehe~~den back to room....& den my dear Jonathan says ther's discussion for de assigns.....& again go to Cheng hs for discussion...
Tis time realy gt trick by TYS again...cos of her perfect acting skills...which act tat she darn tired....complain tis n tat...bt act she noes evrythg....XD

Bt mana tau say discussion go ther tok cock oni for tat half n hour n Yee Sing which bday falls on de same day wit me oso come up...weird...evry1 wants to discuss de assigns in Cheng kitchen....ahaha....

Den Off~~de room was dark~~& den come la...Happy bday to u....happy bday to u~~~
Cake come in....another suprise party from Jonathan,Cheng, Meiyi, William, Huat, Wendy, Sok li for me n Yee Sing....shock!!!ahaha....bt its a great 1....
Gd plannin by Jon & Ys~~XD

We gonna have a grand buffet tomoro evening....hehe...wee~~^^

Lastly....Happy bday to myself.....a great celebration bday in UK!!!
Wat else can I ask for????=D

WAKE UP!!!!!

2010-06-24T00:47:00.000-07:00

Duno y sudenly i feel myself nt in reality lidat....
I'm in UK...although ady almost 3weeks here....i still dun believe...
Y ha....??
Bt sudenly when we're after dinner...YS say dun u feel sad we stil hav 2more mths here oni...
Ya....sudenly i feel like...ya ha...abit sad...dun feel lik goin bak M'sia...
Although i realy miss my family n frens in m'sia...
Bt here seems lik a fresh start of evrythg...rite??

Helo...Maria...pls wake up lo ok!!!
U're at UK d....wat u thkin sumur??
Treasure tis moment more than anythg else....
Gt a Degree & make ur parents proud of u!!!
& den enjoy life den bak Msia find a gd job & start to pay up ur debt!!!Argh...de hardest part!!
Ahaha.....tats de cycle of life rite???XD

Emo~I've been living in tat world too long....
I can gt up...bt depend on myself whether i want o nt oni...
Bt den after Ys told me de details...
I shud gt up nw & move on!!!Shudnt put too much at 1st...shud have listen to my fren..
Nw...I shud~~
Nt to look back cos i had a better future waiting for me...
Nt to put too much cos i noe at de end, de suffer one would be me again....
I dun wan it to happen again..It's lik a endless dark world...that covers all over me..Fuck!!!

So~~Maria,U shud noe wat u shud do nw rite??
Gt ur fatty ass up & start walkin to de future..pls...
Ahaha...Thanks to my dear fren who und me.....support me....realy thanks...touch...
Cos thy've been thru all de rough moment with me...
Thanks alot Yok-Ke-San!!!XD

Love Game

2010-06-19T00:27:00.000-07:00

Love game is a vry dangerous to play with especially when its concern with ur heart.
So v jus gotta be very careful in tis game....

De 1st & de most important rule is : Never Fall In Love easily!!
( Damn!!!Bt I always fail to do so)

Argh....I jus wanted to be happy for once...pls...do let me....
Dun torture me ok ma....
Jus let me go if u're nt so into me...pls~~
I scare of fallin into tis trap again n again...
Oni my frens noe hw hard it is for me to stand up again...
So...pls let me...stay away from de hole longer....

I wanted to love u more,
Show u more~~
Bt I'm scare~~realy...
U made me feel insecure wit ur acts...
Damn!!! I jus hate myself rite nw...realy...
Miss u...bt i noe i canot put too much in...
Den i suffer myself here....Wonderin hw u feel...>.<

Discomfort

2010-06-11T23:30:00.000-07:00

I dun care,
I dun wanna noe,
I dun wanna feel,
I dun wanna hear,
I dun wanna see,
I dun wanna noe anythg bout u anymore.....
It jus makes me suffer.....
I tot wit tis thinkin i had let u go....bless u...

Bt whn ur news appear in my fb page stated " Au went from being "single" to "in a relationship."
Suddenly...I feel so gloomy, so down....
I cant help myself to comment wrote the congrats words to u~~
After tat all I wanna do is jus cry in de rain....so tat no 1 can noe wat im feelin nw....
Thkin mus u do tat??
Bt I noes u well,u mus had found her oni u decide to change de status,
Last time whn we're together u nvr change....
She wil be ur future d....

I smile as happy as possible,
I laugh as hard as I can,
I be who I wanna be which is me,
I found back de old me,
Bt y....whn its bout u, i become so weak....
I noe deep down thr will always be u inside....jus I din show it out....

Whn de world thks tat I'm realy happy wit +ve attitude,
Bt Im de oni 1 who noe hw I feels inside....

All I can do is jus bless u,wish u n her both happy....All de best in ur work as well....
Pls take care....she'll be ther to take care of u as well...Who am I to worry rite??

Dream Come True^^

2010-06-06T07:30:00.000-07:00

Its Sun morning in Sheffield nw....
I stil dun believe i act at UK d....

Jus lik 2days ago i'm stil in M'sia...bt nw..UK...
I miss my family back ther...& oso frens...
We have time difference of 7hours so i'm stil trying to adapt....
Its oni fries,chic all meat here to eat..gosh....
Ystrdy eat a pack of maggi mee wit de prawn paste my mum made...Yummy....although its jus a simple 1...misses my mom cook as well...>.<

Ahaha...however de life here is lik peaceful quiet...with de cold weather which I love it vry much...^^
We gonna start our orientation tomoro....den we got de chance to look at our Uni~~hehe...abit excited about it...

De thg here r lik damn cheap if we're earning de salary here....cos its lik oni 2-3pound for 1 clothes...if u can find it...
Its a shoppin heaven here.....cos i jus bought Britney Spears 100ml perfume for oni 19.90 pound le....which equal to RM 100 lo....so its quite worth it la....=D

The scenery here is wonderful...abit feel dun1 go back tim....=D

Argh...my camera gt no memory card reader....nw i oso duno hw...de pic inside canot transfer to comp...damn...seems lik i jus gotta use my hp to take pic....haih~~so sad....>.<
Dun hav cable o anythg...damn dao~~

Its oni 7.30 am here....n i canot sleep d...evry1 seem wake up to on9~~ahaha....
Nvrmind..its SUN...we gonna explore more about Sheffield ltr....

少了一个人

2010-05-20T07:13:00.001-07:00

朋友聚会吵闹的快乐在她们离开以后变稀薄
走路回家回像山洞的窝突然渴望有人能来接我
泡著热水在浴室赖著思念却也被滚烫冒烟了
最后的简讯看到能背了多久没有再联络一想还是痛

少了一个人宠爱我
朋友的爱成分就是不同
最难过是笑著面对被羡慕自由
练很久的成熟也快遮掩不住寂寞

妈妈在电话裏挂念我上次欲言又止她还记得
喜欢装没事其实最累了但我清楚很多事哭了也没用

少了一个人拥抱我
那种拥抱能够忘了所有
两个人就算下雪后赤脚逆著风
也不觉得冰冻还笑得比阳光炽热

少了一个人懂得我
能够体会我倔强又脆弱
不记仇温柔原谅我情绪太波动
用泪光舍不得融化我累积的寂寞
很固执无条件爱我从来没变过
在大吵的时候会抱著我沉默不动

Really misses u so much~~haih~~=(

你找到幸福了

2010-05-20T07:13:00.000-07:00

You're happy cos u've found ur happiness
b4 I go,u already gt urself a new one...
Bt yet I'm stil here hangin although I clearly noe u'll nvr come bak to me...
U realy turn so fast till i nvr gt a chance to react...

Wat i regret de most is I already knew the prob bt yet I so insist on goin on,nvr tok bout tis matter...
I angry de most is that u didnt even giv me a 2nd chance to make tis relationship right~~& straight away jump to the other person...

She's de one u love nw...
She would gt all de attention she nid from u nw...
She gt ur care...
She oso have ur love...

Bt y...whn u say we r nt in de same path...u so sure that she's in de same path wit u??
Doesnt we oso been thru de way u treating her nw??
Dont we oso have happy moments for u to remember??
Y u had to be so cruel towards me??
De way u treating me nw is nt de way u make me angry so tat i can leave u early...,
It jus make me more sad & left oni sour memories that i can gain from here...realy...>.<

Even ur sis started to treat me tat way...Fierce to me...
Lik I'm de one who betray this relationship...
Am I nw??
Who turn his back on me & ran to others whn I realy Loves him & needed him de most??
Y am I treated lidat??
I gt no choice bt to stand tough~~
Whn i go bak i feel so stress to face her...
I rather bak late...or if u're ther oni i bak...

Nvrmind al tat I told myself...
Thgs are diff from de past nw...
I noe i have to move on by myself...
I noe i canot rely on u anymore...although i realy nid it...
I Stil have my dear family & frens wit me...

Bt..i realy wanted to let u noe...I realy put in 101% into this relationship~~=(
My fren told me...nvr put in 100% if de relationship is nt more thn a Year...I guess its a lesson...

♥那么近却又那么远的感觉

2010-05-07T19:13:00.000-07:00

As a fren was wat u told me u wanna be~~
I couldnt realy accept it,yet i mus force myself to accept tat tis is de truth happening.
I saw u was much happier lidat, I feel happy,
Bt same time I feel sad y u can let it go so fast & easy~~
Dear no sad whn u decide tis decision ma??
Is there realy no love for me from u??

U started to drink again...
Bt wit ur colleague which is gal~~
I noe i already have no right to be jealous o angry.
Bt tat's exactly wat i'm doin whn u say u wan go movie, dinner wit thm.
I would thk y dear last time wit me canot lidat, bt y nw...
Haih~~oni dear noe de answer...
If I'm was de one who do tat go out wit guys would dear feel sad ma??

My heart feel heavy day by day when de day pass~~
Cos i noe i'm leavin you soon...
I realy dont hope it would pass so fast...
I noe i have to learn de hard way to let u go~~
Bt I'm afraid dear...I so scare....
Although u told me u wil stil care for me.
Bt after all tis will u contact me???
I nvr wanna lose contact wit u~~

Tis few days i consider myself vry clever d...cos i manage to nt cal dear during my free time...which last time i always did...
Its awkward, cos usually i wil cal dear if anythg...tellin u al de exciting thg happen..bt nw i cant d...
I jus have to keep it to myself...

I feel so suffer...bt yet i noe tis is de step i nid to take cos I ♥ You.
I noe all u did was nt to let me put hope on u~~
Bt u noe its impossible...
All i wish was jus tat we spend tis few weeks happily & then we recover from our past~~
I nvr expect u'll leave me as I stil gt alot of thg I wanna do with u together hand in handin future....
I always convince myself tat " We jus met at the wrong timing, Path was nt de same as we aim for different thgs "

~Sending U Off to Work❤~

2010-04-27T08:30:00.000-07:00

28/4/10

8am in de morning~~
I've sent u to work lik I always do last time...
I jus love tat feelings...cos v can chat, talk rubbish, have a great laugh b4 u go work.
After u went down the lift, I'll peek u through de window to c u went into car til u drove away~~
Bt since i worked, I nvr gt de chance to do tat again...cos i leave early den u to work.

Ystrdy i went to drink wit wit whole bunch of frens...
Cos i jus thk tat...whn i drunk den i can forgt evrythg~~
Bt seems lik it doesnt works...although is jus half way drunk,I wil stil thk of u & wat u've said to me~~
Tears uncontrolably drip again~~

I woke up feelin so dizzy & have de feeling of wanna vomit...
Cos i din take my dinner & jus drink...
Dear ask me to take MC,bt i tot it will be ok...after took my bath..feel so sick den i jus sleep bak...
Dear ask me "U drink alot ystrdy??gt take ur dinner ma???"
I realy happy to hear tat u wil stil care bout me...

I wanna went off to sleep...bt mind jus keep on processing...memories keep scanning through~~I jus decide to wake up on9~~
If last time de me...surely sleep d.bt nw...i almost have a hard time to sleep...>.<

Evey now & then, whenever I'm so free...my heart wil lingers bak to u~~
All thgs bout u will scan thru again~~
I realise hw much I ♥ You, Hw important U r in my heart.

~It Changes From Becoming My Everythg To Nothg~

2010-04-26T19:13:00.000-07:00

24/4/10

Everythg was so normal whn u fetch me bak Klg in de morning,
I stil cal u, to ask bout ur work evrythg...
Stil in de status of a gf to u~~
Bt midnite whn i' singin k with my fren...u jus send me a msg & say tat u canot commit in to tis relationship as your heart stil gt her.

That 1 lil msg realy SLAP me HARD,STAB thru my HEART!!
My whole heart become so heavy~~,
My Foot steps become heavier everytime i walk a step,
Feelings was so messy at tat time i dun even have de energy to talk anymore jus cry~~
I tot u were jus too tired so u wan a rest,bt after al tis 8mth+ u told me, its cause of her stil inside ur heart,
I nvr blame u, as i understood its nt easy to forgt de 8yrs relationship that u've expected to gt married wit her tis yr,
Bt nw oni i noe tat u've nvr realy open ur heart to let me in,
wat I am to u al tis while???

We tok it through de nxt day, oni i noe tat she sits deep in ur heart which u cant jus pluck it out.
U say u dun1 to be unfair to me,as u cant realy commit into tis relationship & cant giv me wat i want.
Al u say was right bout me, I nvr realy want to admit that i'm suffer in this relationship although in de early time i had notice tis prob.
All i thk was u is my 1st priority whn i thk of sumthg,
All i thk was she's ur past, wat important nw is i'm wit u~& i wanna cherish al de moment tat v could spent together.
I will try my best to make tis relationship works & same time i giv u bak de Happy memory.
Evrytime i jus dun have de guts to tel u de prob tat i facing wit u cos u jus dun have de time for al tat,u were jus too tired to even have de time for tis miscelanneos prob.
So i jus rather i keep it to myself & hope tat evrythgs jus go fine.
Bt seems lik im wrong, if early we jus tok bout it, will it end up lidat??

U say whn u on Fb de other nite & u saw my profile pic which stated
" I ❤ TAZ ", All u thk was u scare she saw tis. U dun1 to let her noe, u already have others, which it hurts so much to me.

U told me u realise tis prob very long d,jus u dun hav de guts to told me,
de more i treat u gd, de more stress u are cos u feel tat u cant giv me wat i wan.
All u wan nw is jus alone to calm down evrythg, which i realy scare of hearing it.
Thos were de words tat my ex told me whn he wanna break.

All ur world revolves about her,
De pillow u hugging, tat nite oni i noe tat she's act sleep on tat, tats y u cant even let me touch it.
I knew ur hp al along oso gt her pic inside,
U nvr stored our pic inside ur hp,
De lil gal u took pic wit, u were so happy cos u told me u n her use to very lik lil gal, & she was exactly look alike lik de lil gal u n her want to hav.

Nw our relationship is jus lik stranger where i can feel tat whn u face me u feel so stress, cos i was so down to let u noe bout it.
Nw i jus cant focus on wat im doin act,
U were right, after i be wit u, u were my priority as u were de energy of de day to let me go thru de whole day,
Bt nw de energy has gone, i feel so LOST,
My heart seems so empty, everyday de foot steps i took out of ur hs feel so heavy, cos i jus so scare i cant c u again.

We use to have so much laughter together, bt nw al tat seems jus vanish~~

Mayb 1day our conversation nt more thn 100 words...Last time we use to talk alot~~
De journey to my work place seems so long, unreachable~~
De music i listen to become so sorrow tat act contains wat i act felt in my heart,
Tears uncontrolably wil drops, whn i jus thk of wat u told me tat nite.

All I noe was i jus wanna be wit u wit happy moment til i leave to UK.
Bt u say u cant do it,cos u dun1 to giv me any more hope.
I realy jus hope for you to giv me de happy memory b4 i left to UK,
I noe i wil miss u hardly over ther..
Bt i wan happy moment which i can put it in my heart as well...

Love was a dangerous game to play with, Whn U're so Involve in it,somethg went wrong, U'll Hurt deeper~~

~SiLent Hurt~

2010-04-17T19:13:00.000-07:00

17/04/2010

Ppl wouldnt noe wat pain tat we feel, whn we tel thm, cos de needle nt poke at their skin neither happening to thm...
Say was easy for thm....

Here I am...listening to Lee Hom- Ni Bu Zai, thkin hw my relationship is mayb almost de same as de story goes...
I tot i shud be de one who loved by ppl, yet end up I be de person who loves ppl.
Nw I und y ppl say we mus be de one who loved by ppl so we will be de happiest person in de world...

De 8th mth d...yet, i stil doesnt feel de love tat i shud from u??
Mayb...U too busy with ur work d??
Mayb...after work u'r so tired til u have no energy to thk bout it anymore...
Mayb...U expect me to und ur circumstances???
Mayb...U feel its nt a need to improve it???
Mayb...Btw us stil haven und each other???
Mayb...Cos we dun have our own private time together???
Mayb...Is due to our lack of communication???
May...tis...Mayb...tat...alot of Maybes~~

Mon-Fri work..sumtimes Sat oso....
Bt whn u no work,we seldom go paktoh d...cos u wil say u tired...wanna rest...ok tats fine wit me..cos i und...i nvr force u...
Bt wit ur frens...u nvr seems tired...cos u say u meet thm less...ok..tats oso fine...
Bt...have u ever feel hw i feel??
Mayb..de way u show ur love is diff gua...which i stil nid time to adjust to it...

I LOVE de way tat U're CONFIDENT in urself,
Bt tat oso makes me feel insecured from de inside...
I'm goin UK for 3mths+ in June...do u noe hw i would feel??
I noe I shud be confidence in u~~
Bt...den de way u show it,jus makes me no faith in it...can u gt it???

I realy can c de Future whn im wit u~~which i dun c it on other guy,
bt can u jus giv me de confidence to jus keep HANG ON!!!

Wat i do jus keep to myself which nobody could act und...
Haih~~>.<

End Of 2nd yr 2nd sem of my Coll Life~~@@

2010-01-22T22:05:00.000-08:00

22/01/2010

Today..last day of my finals...Integrated Marketing Comm...It was a tough paper which i almost tot i could crap...bt seems lik nothg came out although in the morning i drank a bottle of BRANDS chic essence~~XD

Wake up at around 4.30am forcing my eyes to open & study for de last time, took bath around 6am & get ready to catch the bus~~ When i step out of the hs...trying to convince myself izit today FRI???Exam day??almost feel lik it isnt & I Took out my HP to check on de day~~Stated FRI 22/01/10...tellin myself yes...its fri~~correct...ahaha~~

I gt 3days time to study for it...bt din treasure & only start study 2days ago...infront of comp chasing de korean drama Boys over Flowers which is jus de same version of Taiwan Meteors Garden~~Damn...I kept tellin myself to study~~bt de attention is jus on de drama and Bejewel...i became addicted.... Outside de class room we were about to goin~~FUCK!!!!saw a teacher who i hate her vry much & de same time she nvr like me b4~doesnt matter~~its gonna b de last time i c her~~BLek~~=P

Inside de hall....i Look at de question lik thousand of question mark on my head figuring out hw to do..i was so tired i could jus fall asleep on de paper...Bt determination told me i cant~~I wan go UK le....mus atleast pass~~ I nvr left blank on de paper bcos i believe tat jus by simply tembak...at least u gt de chance to have some marks if correct...hehe~~^^

Times nt enuf to do all de ques a~~i spent 1hour+ jus on de 1st ques~~god~~den fast fast do all de left ques...hmm...jus hope i could pass la...den i'll b vry thankful jor~~=) Clock strikes 12.15pm...it was HOLIDAY lu~~woohoo~~bt~~sad tat im leavin coll n cant have bak thos coll life jor~~ I realy loves it~~hanging out around wit YS,bobo them...evryday jus laughter wit frens...assignments..i gonna miss u~~n my teamate who loves last min work~~bt stil v manage to come out de result~~^^

After tat v went to Pizza Hut~~WTF!!PH again??i jus had it ystrdy wit dear~~haha~~cant thk of it...i would have vomit...eating so much of it... Reach ther i cal dear~~he say he's at Ampang n could come over to fetch me~~Wow...good....tot of eating Happy Season geh~~mana tau~~Uturn again go PH bside eat KFC~~zzz~~ahaha~~XD Bt still feel bad leaving my beloved frens behind n din pei thm for de last day~~hmm~~>.< After eating KFC, dear say he wan go Serdang franchisee ther do somethg so drop me at South City Plaza to shop shop sin~~go in...mana tau goin~~De CNY song wah!!lik realy thos cny mood....pi ling pa lang~~so loud~~fuck u no free style~~ahaha~~XD Many shops is close...doesnt c any PArkson sign..so jus take a stroll on de ground floor..n bought somethg tat is buy 1 free 1 item~~hehe~~den dear cal come say 1 pick me jor..so fast..say will go distribute flyers...

Den v go into housing area...park the car 1 side & starts distributin the flyer by walkin....Damn!! de Sun is hot lik in an oven a~~Feel lik i almost Hangus jor le~~bt its fun distributing it wit Dear~~hehe~~both of us dist till i finish sin...den v went off..n he consider off work la...ahaha~~n v go fo CEndol~~ After that...whole body is so exhausted...mentally tired....gosh~~hot lagi~~den v went bak...bath...den lagi go out...go eat Sushi~~wah~~no rest a...till nw~~>.<

I thk i goin to sleep soon after tis...I can do anythg i wan d nw...bt stil misses coll life~~ Wanna start to find job d lo~~The loan to UK oso i duno hw~~ther is so many rules n regulations to be follow n fulfilled n i cant even find de suitable candidate to b my guarantor...haih~~ really duno hw...bt really wish i could go~~>.<

Hmm~~Tired a~~wanna sleep soon~~a new day new start...tomoro can go shopping lo..with dear...hehe~~XD

ScaRE~~>.<

2010-01-18T19:50:00.000-08:00

14/01/2010

We been together also 5mths d...although thos period of time u do give me c de face...bt stil tat nite is de most scariest one...

I'm scare of the feeling....cos its coming back~~
When always face ur angry face I become small and dont know what have i done to make you angry again~~I really scare...

That nite after you off work i straight see your tat face again....I tot it will be fine soon...bt u say u wanna fetch me back...the feels is like u dont want to see me tats y u fetch me back...

In the car we doesnt speak a word and my tears jus keep fall from ur house to my house...
Stil you doesnt give me "An Wei". I really so sad bout it...y u are lik stone heart tat time...>.<

When almost reach my house only i DARE to speak to u~~i bring up all my courage...den i ask~~
"Wat have i done wrong??to make u so angry me??"
Bt u jus replied "Nothg, my mood is nt good dun wanna tok bout it"
Wat i ask u jus replied me dun wanna tok bout it...wait i exam finish only say~~

It really makes me think back my past...when you dont wanna say a word..which is very scary~~and then end up~~jus lidat...
Haih~~i really duno wat to do tat time jus askin u...den i remembered that i forgot to take my exam slip cos de day after tat is my exam...
Den u have to turn back to ur home...n say i duno u tomoro exam...
den oni i ask u...izit u dun1 c me oni fetch me bak...u din answer me...

On tat moment...i realy feel lik so Hurt...so...Speechless...i oso duno hw to describe it~~
I told u~i realy dun lik tis kind of situation...I dun1 to c whn i go bak i c my parents quarrel den both of us also quarrel...Still tears falling down from my hs to ur hs....

When reach your home I feel so awkward..bt lastly u smile to me...n ask me dun cry anymore...I feel so relieve...bt stil tears would fall~~
U nvr told me y u angry...n I stil wondering about it....

I realy hope i can und u more....n tis few days...i do learned new thgs bout u~~

Its Time to LEt GO!!!

2009-10-06T10:30:00.000-07:00

3mth plus oso over jor....i stil haven gotten over u~~~
bt nw i noe de truth...tat u have others in ur hearts d....
I thk its time for me to LET You Go n Have ur own life....
I wish u all de best~~wit her....
I hope u wont treat her lik u treat me....>.<

Tis is de video i dedicate to u~~>.<

郭靜Claire-我不想忘記你

FiNalLy

2009-09-18T10:45:00.000-07:00

WooHoo~~~After all de hard work tis 3weeks sleepless nitez of burning midnite oil~~~
At last~~all de subject finalz~~finish lu~~HapPy DAO~~~~=D

Nw its time to holiday jor lo~~jus a short 2 week+ nia~~~wanna go wet 99 le~~
bt fren seems so busy,sum workin sumur~~~

De ppl i miss pula workin~~haih~~no time pei me~~siennya~~~hehe~~~^^

WANNA GO OUT!!!GO OUT!!!!PLAY~~~~CLUBS~~~yUHOO~~~~XD

~♥ Care♥ ~

2009-08-28T09:34:00.000-07:00

Care~~mayb is a word i shud leave it long time ago toward u d~~since v break~~
Bt den i stil care~~cos i care bout u~~
Haih~~u say u oso de same~~bt~~y??
Y whn i care u ignore me??
Fuck~~
Its my fault la~~i shudnt disturb u jus nw~~
Im so sory~~dun worry~~I wont disturb u anymore~~
U gt lots of ppl care bout u~~less me 1 i thk its ok~~
Stupid me~~Stil 1 so kepo duno for wat??

Final nxt week start~~bt i jus couldnt concentrate on de study~~
Fuck oni~~i Hate it lidat~~
God pls bless me tis time~~
Realy no mood~~>.<

I'll cherish n appreaciate wat i have nw~~ Include de 1 i love n de 1 who love me~~^^

~~♥ MaRiA♥ ~~

Free~~~bt SiCk..>.<

2009-08-11T04:05:00.000-07:00

At Last~~~last week...everythg has settle....
From Assignment to presentation everythg is done!!!
So i mus enjoy my life n nt trap in it~~~
However its jus for few more weeks~~cos Final is approaching as well~~~
Haih~~tat time mus kept my self in de cage n study kao kao~~~
My teamate is de best....can settle everythg in last min~~realy admire them^^

Went to alot of place last few weeks....
went to PD for bike show n know new ppl....
Its a great experience though!!
Gt to sit in yeng de bike~~~
New fren might cum to KL nxt mth again~~~wit bike~~yu hoo~~^^

Today whole day at home do nothg~~~jus c drama den on9 oni~~
Sick oso...haih~~~sore throat n cough~~hope its nt serious....
Yoke san sick d as well....
if nt act today wan go shopping geh~~~
bt end up have to cancel...
cos everyone sick~~~

H1N1 is scary nowadays....so ppl mus start to take care thmself d....
PLS take care urslef~~~

For you~~~
I hope u to b strong n work hard in ur new found job~~
Hope it brings de best out of u~~~
Pls b strong no matter wat n dun so easily giv up~~~
Earn more money~~~its important~~~

Tis is de week to enjoy everythg d....
I wan to enjoy n nt to thk of anythg~~~
Although i want sumthg to happen....>.<
I'm stil in holiday mood la....everythg went pass by too fast for me d....
Lidat a sem jiu wanna finish d...haih~~~

Hope all de best for me, frens n u~~~^^

~MaRia~^^

Kuala Kubu Baru Waterfall

2009-07-17T23:20:00.000-07:00

Today....so so so tired a.... Yesterday go Quattro 4am oni back...den today 6.30 nid wake up de...bt i overslept...till 7.50 lidat wake up oni saw Huat msg... Lucky Huat oso buyin thg...if nt i sure kena d de... Wake up faster bath..den chap thg...walau...stil gt abit hangover from yesterday de liquor~~ blur blur~~

V start our journey at 8.10 am lidat...wit 8ppl altogether....
1) ME of coz....
2) Mei yi
3) Cheng
4) Jonathan
5) Wei Chien
6) Kar Keat
7) Kah Hing
8) Huat
in 2cars....den reach de destination around 9.50 am lidat...bt..stil haven reach our waterfall o... Stil have to walk walk walk.....
Hike thru de trees....stone....hills....river.....tunnel.... Ther is total of 4 crossing if nt mistaken~~
Den a...de stone in de river is damn slippery de lo~~~fal down few times...kns..wetz~~~>.<
Ahaha~~ Den a...in tis trip...realy can born out de TEAMWORK spirit...coz everyone helpin everyone thru de road...help thm climb hills...take thgs...cross rivers...ahaha...its fun...n oso DANGEROUS le...
Den a...de water a..is damn cold de lo....cold dao lik ice water....GRrrrr... We walk walk walk....at last...after an hour of hiking.... Sampai dah~~~de wonderful waterfall....

At ther....eat our NAsi lemak n bread wit tuna...gt many fish as well... V gt feed thm la..although ther's a sign say canot feed...
WEll...RULES ARE MEANT TO B BROKEN~~haha...XD

Reach ther...tat WC macam budak kecik lidat..nvr saw b4 poo2...terus fast fast jump in n den panjat here n ther... Jon say his pants makes him looks lik gay...funny la... WC keep singing de WE R DE WORLD in de forest...sound pollution~~

De most happening is whn JOn a..climb de rock n wanna jump...bt mana tau...he tergelincir..den fall lik a sardine...walau....the expression a...damn funny wei...keep swim swim after he fall... macam buta arah~~HAHAHAHAHA....de scene is too funny d....

Then thy more fei...nak bina empangan...gather all de stone to block de wall...sohai~~ tat KEat a..so serious in collecting de stone...n WC busy givin instrustions n build de wall wit stones~~~duh~~

De water is cold dao~~~beh tahan lo....bt after goin jiu ok la... tat Kah hing..walau..wear belt goin...boom dao~~ahaha.... It is nice to go near th nature sumtime....quite fun oso..... But~~jus nw jungle trekkin tat time...de tress thos
keep cut my leg hand...nw gt bruise d...sad..

Den ystrdy sumur fall down back club coz leg Zhau KAn...kns...nw so kao lat...
V at ther...play till around 2 sumthg...den hike back again....
Around 3pm lidat reach....outside...
KNS...no ppl work de...den hav to change at outside lo...no toilet available...back home oni bath...
Reach home around 6...den FB awhile...bath...den c tv eat~~~til nw...

Whole body aching~~so damn tired~~
Tmoro sat n sun sumur nid go YS hs dicussion for assign...
tis week din back KLg....
Have to sleep early lo tonite~~~eyes oso tired d... no mood do assign oso....haih~~~
Can v make it??left 1 week for us...pray to god~~~
My leg so pain...nw keep lik gt water....>.< Haih~~~

~HaPpY BdAy To MySelF~~^o^

2009-07-13T01:45:00.000-07:00

13th July 2009....
A yr have pass~~Tis yr n last yr nt de same~~
Tis yr i celebrate alone~~
Ahaha...bt time stil de same lidat pass by me~~
Wish Myself happy bday ba~~
All de best,Wish Came True~~

Tis yr 21st d lo....
I wanna do sumthg tat i might nt dare to do de....
Wanna try everythg....
ahaha.....

Hm~~nothg much..
Tmoro test again...bt i din read dao...
Lik nt scare lik tis...
Duno hw to do tomoro jiu cham~~~

Hmm...ki pou hang pou ba....
Late d...wanna sleep liao...
Hope i can happy always....

Erm...u're nt de 1st to wish me....i'm disappointed...
Bt i gt my fren....
Thanks for their wishes o...
Love u guys so much~~~

Sweet dreams to me....^^

WiCkEd SiCk

2009-07-10T14:10:00.000-07:00

Till today....i d sick for almost a week d....
So suffer....firstly it is jus flu...bt den its attackin me every morning n nite....
ystrdy beta...no attack so kao lat...bt...today wake up head so hot...
Feel lik fever...~~haih~~

Hope tat sum1 can take care me now~~
Nid wen nuan~~>.<

Ltr 3pm gt midterm test for de SPM subject...
Shit...gt read lik no read lidat...
hope can pass le...
If nt...de lect will photostat our paper let de whole couse c....>.<
So sia sui la tat time.....

Den after test back KLg lo.....
Erm...wanna c doc ma??

3more days.....hehe~~all goes well for me lo....^0^
Do i realy have de chance ma??
If nt...dun giv me hope~~i'll lean on tat hope to keep on goin~~~

~MaRiA~

MemoRies

2009-07-08T17:25:00.000-07:00

Memories will always be inside my heart.....
Ppl say its hard to forget ur 1st love....
It might b true.....
Bt it depends on whether u wan to realy let go tat relationship or nt.....
N i noe it realy hard...although u wanted to...

Years, mths,days pass by.....
Last yr de tis day tis mth......
V were planning to celebrate for my bday at club....on de 13th July...
And u did...u celebrated for me...it was an unforgettable bday ever....n i wont forget about it..thanks...
N v couple up on my bday...So sweet~~
So...hope till it would last a yr n den v'll have a anniversary....
Bt v d cant make it d....because ther's too many thgs tat happen in de 11mths time....
There are Happiniess,Sadness, Gratefullness, Bless, and Love....
All de ups n downs ,Sweet Sour relationship v have tried....
Bt end up...v cant make it....bcos??

Of a word.....I trust u too much...Trust tat u'll really love me till de end....
Thk tat i'm d gd enuf for u n u wont find others....
Bt i'm wrong~~ Seems lik u stil crave for de outside world....stil wanna have fun...
I gt a shock whn answers about ur behaviour started to reveal to me one by one...
And de worse...it have to cum from others....
I d tried my best....realy...giv my all....to save up tis relationship...
Why??Can tel me y ma??U have to be lidat....
Bt~~end up....i am de one who who end tis relationship....
And u gt nothg to tell me....
I really disappointed....Bt...i Choosen tis decision....although i cant take it...

I stil care bout wat u do,wher u go....
Whn i on FB every week i will saw ur club pic....
Seems lik after v broke....alot of gal started to comment u....
Bt i dun und...y u mus go club every week??
I tot u say u hate Club....
It make s me heartache de most whn i saw u drunk lik hell lying on de floor....
Y mus lidat??
U realy can jus let it go so easily tis relationship....

I ask u....u say u jus go ther drink liquor oni...
U say u gt no answer...jus noe tat u miss me....
Izit??I tot....bt den...i cant c de action....
Its ok...ur rite whn u tel ur bros...
U d have ur own life....Single life....
N i shud move on wit my own life as well....
Mayb i'm de one who cant make it...
USELESS ME!!!I haTE MYselF LidaT!!! >.<

Jus nw whn i'm in bus....suddenly i thk of many thg bout u n me....
Tears falls unconsciously from my eyes....
And i rub it off...hope tat no one saw....
Suddenly i tot of questions...alot in my head tat i wanted to ask u...n it keeps goes on....
Lik neverending~~~~

Questions such like:-

When u're alone, will u think of me???
When u're driving alone in car, will u thk of me who use to sit bside u?
When u went club,will u thk back our 1st time met up in club?
When u're cleaning ur room, will u thk back hw fun it was whn v clean my room together?
When u're sleepin at nite,will u thk back hw v hug each other sleep?
When u're wit ur frens, will u hope tat i can join u to have fun as well??
When u're Msn-ing,will u unconsciously open our chat log to c back hw sweet v were in msn last time?
When u're lookin at de inbox,would u open up my msgs to jus look at wat i've sent u?
When u're lookin at de pictures, would u also open up our folder to look at our pic?
When u're upset, will u thk of me as ur shoulder to lean on n listen?
When Sum1 said my name, will u feel sad n ur heart aching??
When u say u miss me, do u realy meant it?
Will u care bout me,whn u noe i'm sick?
Will u try to found out hw am i wit other way bside askin me??
When go to certain place tat v used to go b4,will u thk of my existence?
Have u ever refresh back ur mind bout our sweet memories from de beginnning till de end?

Ther's so much more ques i can thk of...
Bt sadly...i have no chance to ask....
Although if i do...
U oso wont tell me de truth jus lik u r hiding sumthg....

Tis Fri ur convo day....
Cant c ur convo lik u c mine....
Abit sad...bt its ok....u have ur frens to c....
Congrats on ur convocation k...^^
I wish u al de best in ur Life,jobs, and oso love life....

~MaRiA~^^

Suffer

2009-07-06T01:20:00.000-07:00

Sun nite...as usual...came back from Klg to start de 8am class tomoro...duh~~~
Sick a...from de ystrdy de liquor at maison....god....
I was nt enuf sleep....sleep at6am den 9sumthg let mum wake me up jor.....
God....de whole day my head is spinning coz of de liquor....

Maison...ahaha...a club tat v used to go last time....
Renovate den reopen again....
Nothg much different act...jus add sum pic on de toilet wall...duh~~~
No as pack lik last time oso jor la....

Nw suddenly de nose keep running nose...non stop...y la....
Suffering man....

Stupid assign...haven done by reading de article yet...tis week wanna pass up....
Fri gt mid term test...SPM...god...i langsung duno anythg bout hw to do it...
Who wanna help me nw??

June end...say hi to July again....so fast o...
SAy Happy birthday in advance to myself 1st...ahaha....
Em...let me thk back alot of thg...

Times....will heal me i guess....can it??
Nt sure...jus can c....>.<

Its time to sleep...if nt my mum keep say i gt panda eyes d....shit....ahaha....
Nitez~~Sickness...pls go away~~~~=(

U Will Always Be de Same

2009-07-02T22:39:00.000-07:00

Y i say so??
Coz u always will be de same ppl wit same attitude no matter its before or after...
Doesnt care ppl waiting for ur answer de...
No responsibility....

I call u, n wat u say??
U say u will call me later...
Den...end up??
Wat is de time nw??
If u wanna go club jus tel me...its ok de...
Dun let me wait lik so poh lidat for ur damn simple answer...
Jus a "YES" or "NO"??
So HARD ma??

Haih~~~okla...I Guess its time...realy nw its de time...
Let go ba~~u have ur own life d....
Many frens will care for u....U dun nid my care anymore~~i noe...=(
I duno y i so stupid stil trust wat u tell me...haih~~=<

Tis is week 6 d....Shit a...many assignment oso i haven start....
Nxt week gt assignment have to pass up n a mid term test cumin....
God~~help me k...bless me a...^o^

Michael Jackson~~may u RIP..ur legacy will forever be remembered by all...^^

I miss tat sum1 o.....wondering is he oso de same??Hmm....^o^
Wanna Dedicate tis song Hai Shi Hao Peng You By Cyndi Wang to u...^^

So fast already in July d...got to say bye to June...Yrs,Mths,Day,Time keep running...
many thgs oso changes during tis period...wondering am i doin de rite thg??
Rite choice??Rite action ma??
Bt no use to regret d...let it b ba...hope everythg will be fine....^^

~MaRiA~

Zouk 4Play

2009-06-26T13:25:00.000-07:00

Yu Hoo~~~Ystrday went to Zouk Kl Club....
Its de 2nd time went ther la...bt realy different from de 1st time i go...
Weena becum de Zouk ambassador o...so can gt to b in guestlist lo...
Den tis yr age 21 jiu can goin....

It was fun....many frens oso go ther...
Howard, Jason n Hui ru...klg fren oso came...^^

Howard, JAson ,Hui Ru n Me^^

Den stil gt Rain fren around 20 ppl lidat....
Our class oso nt bad la...around 15 ppl lidat oso..hehe...^^

V at Barsonic upstairs...keep take pic....shoot here n ther....^^

v reach tat time de osng stil nt so nice...
bt a...middle tat time...abit high d...den DJ Goldfish....Yoke san Fav DJ went up...
Woo~~stage jiu HOT jor....Everbody started to dance d...
Everybody JUST DANCE~~~~~

All de Pretty Gals....Bt miss out Yoke San...sad..cos she bcum photographer...

Cheng follow us...miracle...^^

Conclusion...Fun...bt tired...my leg damn pain...dance too much jor...ahaha...
Cumback...terus bath..den sleep d....
nt enuf sleep...>.<

RaiNy Day^^

2009-06-24T06:36:00.000-07:00

Today is rainin day o...
Feel good a...coz nt a hot weather anymore...
Today after 4pm went to PJ ther jus beside Jaya 33 nia wo...for casting a secretary de pose....
Act wo...ahaha...1st time...
De casting manager giv me alot of advice a...
Bt stil..i LACK of de feelin of Wei Nan zuo ren...
Bt stil i DONE my best d la...
All de best lo...

Den take lrt back tat time...sumur rain....Saw de keropok lekor...Emm...long time no eat d...den buy Rm 1 5 piece go back eat....^^
Reach home around 7sumthg....tiredz....

Den tot yoke mei wanna go out wit us NS fren de ma...ystrdy plan de...
Bt mana tau she say she sick...
So nw waiting for Chew cum fetch me lo....
Hmm...

Jus nw cal a fren...wanna giv him present de....
Den he ask me go down eat...i sumur thk thk wan ma...coz dun feel wan eat ma...
Den jiu ask him miscal lo if go down...den i go bath....
Den ltr he msg me say tonite yc...feel lik dun lik me go eat la...
Hmm....duno le....feel lik he feel lik i'm annoying to him....
Or mayb his fren dun1 him to ask me....
Haih~~~den ok la...lagipun i oso dun1 eat ma...
Nvrmind lo...yc ma yc lo...c hw ltr la...if din cal jiu suan le...>.<

Haih~~~Tiredz.......
Wanna sleep....suddenly dun feel lik goin out d...
Haih~~Wanna tok to sum1...bt he sumur so busy...haih~~Sad nia....>.<

Assignment a~~~~~ARGH!!!!!!!
Beh tahan d.....whn wanna start o me???
Y i so lazy de????God!!!!bless me man....

Lately jus keep listen to tis 2song nia.....
Jolin-Tuo Shie
Power Station-Bu hui Ku De Ren
Quite nice de song....^^

Another song....Hui Yi Bu Shi Wo de....oso nt bad...^^

~MaRiA~

JoUrNeY

2009-06-23T11:09:00.001-07:00

Today 8am de class bt wake up late at 7.30 lidat...god...
den fast fast wake up bath ready den take cab to coll wit weena....
den reach coll jiu 8.30 + o...so sia sui goin de lecture late....ahaha....
lucky de lecturer forgiv me....^^

Den finish lect at 10am..den discussion awhile den i go do my ptptn thg....
Shit la de ptptn de workers...damn action de....
So HATE them...thk thy so big lidat....hmm...
Wan me go wher find my offer letter o??
Oso duno throw wher d la...duh~~~
Bt canot...mus fast fast find...nid submit...haih~~~
Nid money le....!!!>.<

Den after tat go Klcc wit mindy n yoke san about 12 sumthg lidat....den walk to pavillion meet Weena...ahaha...long journey....
Den go Dragon-I eat...so funny ther...wohoo....

Den shop shop shop...bt i jus window shopping...
Coz wan pei thm buy shirt ma...^^
Den shop till~~~~~7sumthg sit bus wit carmun back condo...so tired... walk back...haih~~~

Den a..at Pavillion meet my NS fren wo...den date nite time yc again....
Den he finish movie around 9sumthg cum to condo reach around 9.30 lidat....
bt wait me n another fren bath till 10++lidat....
Oops....sory Chew....hehe...let u wait til so long...^^

Den yc till 1.30am lidat....cumback...den bath..
write blog...sien de life...
Assignment pilling up...
Bt i haven done anythg yet le....
Shit!!!!

Tomoro wanna go til PJ ther audition de ca le fe....duno can ma...ahaha...1st time act...^^
All de best to me o...^^

Stupid fren...wan giv him bday present oso so hard...duh~~~
Sad nia...if dun1 jiu nonit giv jor....ahaha...
I thk he dun need it oso d....>.<

Its late d....have to sleep early...tomoro 10am class...haih~~
I wan b free....of assignment...n jus play....
Mayb my holiday mood haven end....so stil wan enjoy kao kao....>.<

Focus in my STUDIES nw PLS....>.<
Gambateh ne....!!!

~MaRiA~

✿【ReLiEvE】✿

2009-06-11T21:40:00.000-07:00

First time i feel so relieve after all my sufferring for few mths back.....
Mayb if i took tis decision earlier....i wont suffer til so long ba....

Oso blame my own stupidness...i dun want to trust other ppl say....
And decided to trust u....coz i realy believe in u....

Few frens started to give me hints bout u whn i tel thm my prob.....
Bt i stil stupid stupid de ignore n trust u....
End up....tis is wat i gt...

Truth started to reveal to me lately....one by one....
First time i noe...its really heartache.....
Bt soon...i started to feel....use to it....
Maybe u is lidat de ppl....cant change d....
I c wrong u....i take it as my lesson lo...my experience....

I wont tel ppl hw i treat u hw gd,or hw bad....
U noe it urself den its enuf ba.....
I wan u to jus remember tat u have a good memories wit me before....
Hope u never regret u chose to be wit me at 1st....
I oso wanna thank you for al the sweet memories u gave....
I will still keep it...n let time...slowly fade it ba....
THANKS.....

Decision is i take de.....or mayb u oso wanna say it very long d....
Nevermind....nw u can have ur freedom d....
Go have fun ba....FLirt...Sms...Club....
All u can do it d....Enjoy....^^

RELIEVE!!!!I'm on my own....
Thanks to all my frens who be wit me whn i'm sad....
U all are my sunshine whn i rain....
Ahaha.....^^

Coll start 3weeks d....assignment is cumin one by one....
Stress cumin in d oso....walau....
HELP me a~~~~~~
Bt i thk can make it de....
GAMBATEH ne.....^^

✿MaRiA✿

Damn!!!!

2009-06-11T09:30:00.000-07:00

Everytime u go club...din tell me...i cal u no matter hw many time..sure u dun1 answer de....
pls la...use other method la k...if nt scare let me noe u go club can jus let me noe...nonit dun1 answer my call....
U noe wat is PISS OFF ma??

Haih....one time one time lidat giv u chance...bt u duno hw to appreaciate...u wan me how o??
Ystrdy i ask u gt go ma...wat u say??
No mood...dun1 go...
Den ask can today cum fetch me ma....u say FRi...ok...wats de reason??
U say no reason...ltr u gt train ball al thos...ok...fine..den train til wher nw..??
Fuck la...stop bluffing me can ma??
Im tired le...stil wan torture me till whn o??

Today 12 June d..1more day jiu 11mth d,
1more mth jiu 1yr d...bt...I thk v dun have de chance to celebrate it d..
Haih~~my heart seems like...hard to say...
I cant say tat i totally dun love u d...stil gt de abit if i force myself to...
Bt i really cant take it liao...one time one time u lidat bluff me...
One time one time...i saw evidence u flirt wit other gals...
One time one time i Forgiv u...bt u stil wanna repeat de mistake...
Haih~~i really nothg to say...

My fren told me...whn v lenjing tat time..u everyday fetch a gal go coll de...gt ma??
Gt fren told me say...u went to club wit gals...den hugs n kisses...gt ma??
She oso told me tat she saw wit her own eyes u dun1 answer my call although i really call lik mad gal to find u...gt ma??
U told ur fren dun tel me wher are u tat time...coz u act at a gal hs...gt ma??
I nt wit u tat time u go find other gals...call,msg thm...gt ma??
U flirt wit other gals in msn....gt ma??
Haih~~i stil willin to forgiv u although wat had happen above really hurts me alot...
U gt appreaciate ma??

I dunola...bt i realy chose to trust other ppl more thn u d lo...coz of wat u done...
Pls dun blame me...I noe u stil lik to play...
I nvr control u ma...am i realy such a bad gf for u...til u wan treat me lidat??
U can love me deeply last time...bt nw u treat me as shit nia...
Haih~~

CONFIRM!!!
Fren told me u go MOS club...ok la....as u lik lo....
Scold me whn i go...say i din tel u...ur self le hw???
Y muz keep lidat kek me o??
Speechless...sad...kek sam nia...

Ok la...really make up my mind d....
I'll let u go n have ur own life...wit ur frens...wit any 1 u lik....u dun hav to include me in ur life anymore...nonit la..

I appreaciate everythg u done for me...realy...
I appreaciate the love and affection u gave me....
U r my 1st love...no 1 can replace wat u done for me....
I never regret once i fall in love wit u...n realy hav a great memories wit u...

Bt...if thgs cant b fix d...ther's no point i keep on wan u stay on my side...
Coz u will keep find a way to bluff me...
Which i dun lik....haih~~

I hope u can treat ur nxt gf beta...pls dun treat thm lik u treat me....
It really hurts...
Its a hard decision to make...n i noe i will sad...bt...its for both of us good..
Take care....I love you....='(
But now i will love u as my fren...

All de best to you in ur life n everything k....Pls dun always jus dota ball la...Find a mission in ur life den do it k..
Muz proof let ur family c..u is can de...^^

~MaRiA>.<~

KaRmA

2009-05-29T01:43:00.000-07:00

13th July is act a date i been waiting for...coz its de date wher i n dear 1yr annivesary anf its oso my bday...
Bt now...it seems so blur d...

Karma is de word i can use to describe ba...wat i did in de past tat hurt dao ppl...nw it al came back to me to hurt me back...

I really chose to trust u last week whn v're in genting and i saw tat gal msg u bout de "Lao gong wo ai ni" de...i really tot is tat gal cum n flirt u de...

Bt nw wat i c is different...u oso gt go flirt wit de gal...n it started long time ago...even b4 de gal came n add me in FB. She even gave u gifts sent from Kuching...
Everyday u al chat..den webcam..u c her..she c u...so fun...
Evryday u msg her...she msg u...n even call u dear...u cal her BI...

I even saw u tel her u wan settle wit me 1st oni u can b together wit her...
den say til lik u dun realy love me anymore in ur heart juz gt her...n den say u break wit me d de...juz tat i ask u for 2nd chance...
U noe wat i feel me??I really feel lik a slut...let u treat me lidat...
U even ask her wan giv me 2nd chance ma...even though v d together for almost 2mth d after out len jing de period....

Haih...i realy tot v were in a great relationship after evrythg happen...
tot tat u realy love me de lik last time...
Bt y??Why muz u bluff me??
I did told u bout her adding me in FB n ask bout de ques...bt u act til lik u dun realy lik her...n she is de one tat flirt u...y la??

wat i saw in ur msn history...u always call her bi...den say u vry miss her...tis tat....den whn nw i gt to noe d...i ask u..
U tel me u juz simply write to her???
Wow...wat a stupid answer...

At last...all tis while...oni i noe de reason....
U refuse to put our pic in FB..oso coz of her...
Ur display msg...refuse to write bout us oso coz of her...
i even saw tat u say u wan put de...den she say later i misund...
u say more gd if i misund..den u gt topic to tok to me n settle it....
U noe hw hurt ma...whn i c all thos??

I really duno hw to describe my feeling nw...haih~~wat i can do is cry oni....
u say u r sorry...bt...haih~~duno la...:'(

~#aih~

2009-05-15T00:13:00.000-07:00

Ystrdy act vry happy de..cos mornin can b wit dear tat few hours...cuddle wit dear,c tv..den chat chat..although is jus few hours,bt i satisfied..however i oso wish tat de time can b longer...
Bt cant..i hav to go work d..god..realy dun wish to go work.:(

Den at nite,open fb..c inbox..
Nvr tot ppl can ask me such question...on tat time duno wat i shud reply...

Ur fb or duno coll fren..jing ran ask me in fb..whether am i ur gf?
Wat i shud reply?pls tel me..i realy feel weird y she ask...doesnt ur relationship status ther stated clearly tat u're in a relationship wit Maria Tong Huay Leng ma?
Y sumur 1ask???

Den i reply yes,y u ask?
Den she say i tot des no gf?
Den i say y?he told u so izit?
Den she say So?
Den i say y u ask?
Den wait her reply ltr...

DAMN!!!SEEMS LIK SO RUDE LE..DL!!
Who r u o?is u ask me de quest de le..sumur so rude..y?u lik him izit?or wat?duh...wtf!

Who's fault?me or u?
Haih...10mth d us tis May 13th..
I jus request to put our pic in ur profile oso lik wil take ur life lidat...ask u go gentin wit me oso hav to let me wait..din c u ystrdy 1go club stay fren hs,tis sat 1go seremban stay fren hs,din say u hav to let ur fren noe last min...din say tat u need ask parents first...

Oso early early prepare ur clubbin shirt den at nite straight go wat...
Evrytime ask u go sum place u many reason wit me..wit ur fren wont have reason..anytime can go...fuck la...

Ur fren tis sat oso 1celebrate d ma,wat for go club sumur..say no money,den say fren spend..
Y muz go le?din go wil die meh?i oso din go long long time d la..bt u le..mouth say dun lik club,bt keep goin..seems evryweek u'll b in de club...say drink liquor oni..evenin say duno wan go or nt,bt act oso decide d de..whn go sub,already straight bring shirt wat..if i din ask,i thk u oso wont tel me u're goin club ltr...

In de club oso cant reply my msg,enjoy la..fuck la..jus..haih..realy duno hw i shud express d...

I say i wan go,say canot,say wil gt guys tis tat..i und...den guys le..wil oso have gals al tat de ma...haih...ask u cal me after club...oso cant..jus reply a msg lidat....

Gola..gola...al u need is ur bros la...
Nonit any1 else...me is jus extra...u feel lik wan care me,den u care,if dun1 u can whole dy din keep in touch wit me...as u lik la...nw ur "bros" more lik ur gf..thy c u more than i c u...even 1dy din c u,oso wil ask,den inform u wher thy go...then u sure fly go sub c them...

Wat i dun lik is u go club,i hav to c ppls status oni i gt to noe..whn u 1go,nvr ask me de..jus go,bt whn i wan go,i hav to ask ur permission..i scare u angry..bt u..dun care at all..oni whn i confront u..

Haih~~=(

~Maria~

TiReD

2009-05-07T23:52:00.000-07:00

Realy...realy...TIRED!!!
TIRED of everythg in tis world...
TIRED of thinking how to get back together...
TIRED of thinking wat shud i do to make u happy...
TIRED of thinking whn i shud say de right word..
TIRED of thinking how should i do so tat i can let u have back our last time de feelin...
TIRED of chasing u...
TIRED of juz me caring for u, while u juz doin nothg doesnt care...

When browse thru ur FB profile..found out tat act ther's so many thgs i missed in ur life d...
after i work...
Dear~~realy ma??Is my workin is an issue of our relationship getting worse??
I remember once dear told me it is...
If realy lidat...i realy rather dun1 to work to gt back our relationship...Is it too late nw?

I found out tat dear realy feel more happy being wit ur fren...
Am i acting selfish myself to keep on wan u to include me in ur life??
Izit all of these is my fault??
Am i realy nt a gd gf to u anymore...nt de person u cherish lik last time anymore...??

In ur FB u wrote very stress in ur life...
Bt u nvr told me about ur prob...although i ask..
Long long time d...v nvr chat about wat u thk,feel d??
And ther's many fren who cares bout u...
Mayb in ur life, u nvr really love tat person til de end...
and stop in de half way..let de others care bout u..
U und my feelin ma act??

Haih~~last week went ur hs..saw ur clubbing shirt...
I noe de...u went club..bt u say u din hav..juz go dakei n wear tat...
I choose to trust u...
Tis week..ystrdy...10 sumthg lidat... cal me...
den say u 1sleep d..
I realy feel happy at 1st..den ltr feel weird...
coz its Thurs again..
U wont cal me de if u wan sleep...bt ystrdy u cal me...den midnite i cal u tat time...
keep canot reach..coz network no good...
I dunno is u realy sleep or go Club again...
bt u cal me at 4 sumthg...seems lik after cub time...
Haih...duno la...izit evry Thurs oso wan me lidat...
Thk tis tat...I afraid of Thurs d...realy...
I realy wan to believe u de...bt gt 1time i saw ur msg flirting wit a gal named Cindy says tat u realy wana dance wit her de..bt juz tat she went other club...
u noe tat time hw sad i am ma??bt i tahan..coz v juz gt back..i dun1 quarrel..
REaly sad lo...

Even Sun is de day i hope it would cum...oso i dun care anymore...coz its juz lik same other day without u askin me out...although its my off day...
Last week i tot can spend de whole Sun wit u...bt end up...
u hav to go tournament n said i cant go..coz ur car is full...
If realy full can juz tel me on Sat nite..y hav to say i canot go..bt din gv me any gd reason...
n Sun morning oni say...I realy disappointed tatdy...

Even tatdy i wan to meet u,i oso hav to beg for it...u noe hw cheap i feel ma?
I noe u r tired...i noe...bt u noe y i wan tel u last min ma...
Coz i feel lik if i tel u earlier u wil say duno, see 1st...n mayb coz of dun1 meet me, go out wit ur frens...
Tis is hw i feel...y u cant try to und me??
I realy happy whn i wit dear...oni i can feel u act wit me...
Bt whn u're nt wit me...u realy NT wit me...
Nt lik last time d...although dear is far..bt i stil can feel u near...

Last few days...i hav nitemare dreamin tat dear is leavin me...
I keep cal up ur name...bt u oso dun1 to answer me...i juz c ur back slowly fades away...
I realy scare...n wake up to cal u..u answer de cal...n i ask u wher r u??
U tel me at home...den i ask again...u scold me..coz i keep ask...
Mayb ur answer is nt wat i expected ba...last time u will say...
"I'm here dear...dun scare k...dear here beside u"

Tis Few days i keep thinkin hw to let dear gt back last time de feel...
i stil gt 2day leave n realy wana spend it wit u...bt i dun dare ask...
I scare ltr i ask wat i gt is juz disappointment..
I realy gt plan de...bt...haih~~:(
Sun cumin...i noe dear tis week no tournament...
Bt i thk dear oso wont hope wan c me de la....
I oso dun1 force u to c me...as long as dear happy...i oso willing to sacrifice my happines for u...
Nowadays u oso wont cum c my profile d..wont leave any comment or msgs for me d...
Oni me..me oni will look...

My whole body really tired...physically n mentally...
Even my heart oso feel weak n hurt....
Pls cum n save me up...
I juz nid a huge big warm hug from u in ur arms...
Juz little care from u...pls..tis is wat i expect...
Juz take away all tis pain...='(

~~MaRiA~~

JuKaRi Fit To Fly

2009-05-07T21:15:00.000-07:00

Name sound interesting ha...
Em..its a new exercise concept from my fitness centre in Klang...Chi Fitness...
Quite proud oso la...ahaha...
Using flying set to exercise...collaboration of Reebok n Cirque de Soleil..

Yesterday media launch le...9am i jiu hav to b ther d...
So many different kind of magazine reporter came to try it out...
Work as media quite good...can try out tat exercise...
Reebok giv thm a pair of shoe worth RM199,den tops,bottom...
Even provide towels n locks for thm...
Walau...suddenly gt so many thgs free le..so gd..

Its a real excitement man...even 8TV Quickie host Prem n Jules is ther for MC...
I even gt a chance to explain to thm bout the package n giv thm my name card...
ahaha...so suang...take pic wit thm oso o...^^

See lik easy...bt whn v do it ourself...man...its tough lik hell..
Coz i go try it at nite...espeacially de lift ur butt up n engage ur abs part..

Its oni available in our fitness o...4th in de world,1st in Malaysia...
Ppl would cum al de way down to Klg juz for tis Jukari...
At last...Klg gt sumthg to b proud of...haha^^

~MsGs~

2009-05-01T19:50:00.000-07:00

Today whole day..1msgs from him oni...haih~~
Den i reply him..jiu din reply back me d...

Den i juz cal him...he stil wit his fren~~
Haih~~busy till even 30 sec oso canot spend to reply a msg...
Den sumur say ltr will cal me...canot spend a minute to juz tok wit me...
Haih~~i duno he will feel wat if i treat him lidat??

Speechless...

~~MaRiA~~ Sad :<

~LaBoUr DaY~

2009-05-01T13:30:00.000-07:00

Labour day oso nid to work..haih..cant even go out have fun..so shit le..sumur no triple pay..jus gt replacement leave oni..sien..

Feel lik wanna go out for a date..watch movie..den cuddle wit sum1..jus cuddle n do nothing..den tok about good old days..hw v noe each other..hw v started to fall in love wit each other den date,do silly things together,den tok on phone for hours..msg each other lik ther's no endin,hw v love each other company,n hope to b together forever..etc..etc....

But~wher are you??
Wondering...:(

~MaRiA~

JoBs & My FeeLings

2009-04-29T06:44:00.000-07:00

Works...haih...ask me to hit target..in short time??
Mana mungkin o?? But luckily today gt 5sales..left 10 sales...
But i thk oso cant de la...Except if miracle happen lA..
Ahaha...hope so lo...currently i gt 43 Sales...hehe..gdgd..
Den a my manager sumur giv me Incentives Rm200 for my last mth Sales le...
although i cant hit target...beta thn nothg lo...hehe..so Happy~~^^

Today..dear get his result d..ALL PASS o..
Congrats to him..he GRADuate d lo...
But...suddenly i feel sad...coz after tis mayb he wana go UK for his Degree..
Den hw bout me?? Will he leave me??
Last time v use to tok tis issue before...he says he wont leave me here alone de...
Bt nw...would he??

Suddenly i feel so Alone again...Empty~~No Air to breathe...
Why??
I nt so sure...today he whole day oso at Subang...dakei wit his fren thos...din even msg or reply me...
If his fren back here again in Subang...i will feel tat he will spend time wit his fren more again...
Wont even have time for me d....i feel...

Mayb i stil feel tat his care is nt my expectation ba...
Mayb he stil nid more time to find back de old feelings...
Bt everytime i went to his hs...i would c our journey book juz lie ther Untouch....
And everytime i open hope to c sumthg in de last page that might b wrote by him...
Bt everytime my hope juz trash...
Coz it is always empty... :(

Bout de pic...hehe...
ystrdy i sent him a msg on FB ask him can delete ma...
Den dear really delete d o...
hehe..thanks my dear...
Thanks for und my feelings...
Happy now~~

~~MaRiA~~(^^,)

FaceBook

2009-04-27T21:50:00.000-07:00

Today...Damn PISS OFF whn i on9 to FB den saw tat Gal huggin my BF pic AGAIN!!!

DULAN!!!!Is de word tat i can describe my feelin nw...
Y she can lidat hugs other ppl BF n other guys whn her bf is at ther oso...
Haih~~mayb she drunk??mayb she memang wan do tat??or she miang??

F***...my feelings is juz lik 1 go slap her rite in the face...or mayb gv comment at FB scold her!!
Her bf din control her de meh??
Dear duno hw to avoid dun let her hug de meh??
Den evrybody askin...izit she ur gf...tis tat...
Realy DULAN lo...

Haih~~bt u oso dun1 put our pic..wat can i do??
Is nt tat i din try to ask u put..
Bt u feel its ok..den i oso canot say much...
Bt say real de..whn i saw her profile,or his bf profile..
gt put both their pic..i realy jealous de..

Duno la...its no use i quarrel wit u al tis smal matter thg...
U'll juz gonna be frust at me again..n den v'll be lik last time lidat AGAIN!!

I DONT WANT!!coz i feel tat we r happy now n hope for it to be better de...
So i juz 1na try to control myself nia...
Mayb its end of de mth d oso...Aunty cumin visit..make my mood no gd..
Sory dear..if at tis time i MANG ZHANG or sumthg...Pls dun angry me...

Bt i realy CANT STAND when i c tat gal do lik tis...haih~~
I oso wont lidat la if i go club...coz i noe i gt Bf...Duh~~so moody nw..

Sumur today manager ask to hit target in tis 4days...
Mana mungkin o...Giv tat stupid package..juz left 4days oni ma...
ma waived de ADMIN la..say canot pula...
if nt i gt 3sales d la today...
if gt female sign up today den may cum oni noe admin waived for females i more kena Scold..
No brain de manager le...

Bless me i can hit la..so i can earn more money oso...
den can oso tat sum1 to achieve de thg he wan...^^

Bless Me~~GOD~~^^

~MaRiA~ ^^

~My PrEcIOuS Hp~

2009-04-27T04:08:00.000-07:00

Sad~sad~sad~ is de oni words i can describe hw i feel bout my precious hp...
Haih~~y la suddenly wan spoil..
I took care of u so gd..y 1 suddenly spoil...
U make me lost all my notes, sound clip n msgs tat he leave for me...
I cant find back all thos things anymore if I format u.:'(

Yesterday i at Sunway Pyramid..tot juz wan u to be ok den send giv de ppl do de..
Mana tau..ur online ok..bt msgs.notes music evrythg cant goin until nw...
haih~~sad dao me whn de ppl say wana format u oni can ok...
All my thgs will lost...
Bt my notes is inside...al is dear left for me de...
How can i recover back...
Haih~~i realy so REGRET!!!tat i let u gv tat ppl fix...
Nw i rather dun1 on9 so i can recover my thgs...
I cry at tat time whn de ppl say 1 format u...

Haih~~Bt i have to format..coz if nt..u realy canot b use again~~

I go home jiu faster backup ur file d...
Hope everythg backup d la...dun1 to lost de important thgs inside...:(

Notes...Msgs...Sound Clips..u al are important for me...Sob~~sob~~

Bt yesterday..i gt to go out wit dear le...den sumur stay his hs on SAt...so happy...
So long din wit dear d...
Bt i spoil it whn i cry ther bout my hp...
Sory Dear..juz cant stand whn thk dao de documents wil lost lidat...
All is u giv me de le...
i cant lose it~~Its bout us...
Dear giv me de msgs..notes..sound clip v record..mms u sent me...
All is precious to me de....

Dun WANNA LOSE IT!!!
haih~~

Cant OnLine

2009-04-25T18:51:00.000-07:00

So shit le...tis few days i cant on9 wit my mobile....
Life bcum miserable at work..coz time pass so slow...
Ask de repair man d..nid rm40 to fix my phone...
Already pokai sumur nid money...
can fix free bt tat seller i bought from at Subang pula...
NO TRANSPORT GO!!!
Argh~~~fix my hp d,all thg jiu lost d..notes from him,our sound clip...
Duno hw to maintain de notes...its about our journey lai de ma..haih~~

Cant on9 means cant play facebook,cant write blog...so sien...
Bt whn i on9..saw sumthg tat i dun lik...
SAW HIS CLUBBING PIC WIT FRENS...FUCK!!AT BARCELONA~~
Not say i wan jealous although i noe tats his Heng Dai gf huggin him take pic...
Bt..pls la..she hav bf d..y muz she lidat...
If me i oso wont lidat la pls...hugs other guy n take pic lik ownself no bf lidat...
Haih~~u oso will angry la...

I duno tat he act would be more happy goin clubbing wit his frens thn me..
haih~~watever la...
I thk i ok wit de condition now...dun wanna make a fuss...out of it..
DAMN HER!!!!!

Workin at club..is ok...
bt whn cum to de sales time...hard lo...
i nid too hit 56 units tis mth to gt my BONUS!!!!
Bt nw juz left 1WEEKS nia le...
stil nid around 15 units lidat le...
Ppl..outsider...faster cum find me to join member...(HOPE)
hehe^^

Jia you~jia you~~^^

~MARIA~

UsEd To It

2009-04-22T06:39:00.000-07:00

Well~~i think i used to how u treat me d ba..
Din msg me de whole day~~din cal me~~
oni tis few days at nite u cal me...
din tel me wher u go or wat~~

Used to it d..means i oso wont so worry if u din tel me...
al depends to u whether u wana tel me or not...
if not oso i'm ok...
Haih~~i duno la...bt i tot a bf shud at least msg her gf to tell him wherabout al thos...care for her de...
bt all tis thg i din c it on u anymore....
although i used to it...but stil will feel sad...

ystrdy i took a quiz in FB..title..does ur bf realy love u??
Result:Sometimes, your gut feeling is wrong! He so does have something for you.He's a keeper! Just don't do anything stupid, okay?

Wow..i wanted so much to believe it...bt juz time will prove it...n hope tat u realy can prove it to me...

Today...so boring...no sales...bt stil have to hit TARGET le tis month to get my bonus...
ARgh!!! So stress....1na go for a holiday~~~

All de best in ur match today ya...muz careful o...^^

~~MaRiA~~^^

WaT Am I ThInKin

2009-04-18T23:32:00.000-07:00

Ysterdy meet u n v go out...everythg seems so perfect if i din mention bout de issue we r facing...
Bt~~can i juz keep on stand go down...??without hurting myself??
I duno la...whn i back home...hope tat everythg wont end so fast..time dun pass so fast..cos i jus wan to be by ur side..
dear cal me ystrdy whn i din reply u...so long...after wat had happen..my hp gt ur record d...happy...

Bt today...no cal or msgs from u again..cal u juz nw..bt u say u busy..ltr cal me...
again~~i waited..no cals or msgs from u~~
haih~~
5sumthg..i cal again..tis time u answer..i noe u r playin dota..den i say dear~ltr 7sumthg u cum pick me k..u say c 1st..nw dakei..
Y muz say c 1st if u realy 1meet me..if last time..u sure say ok de..without hesitate..
Is nt tat i dun let u ply..jus tat u oso ply whole dy d ma..n oni sat sun i off work early..am i wrong?

De issue...i realy canot tok wit u ma??
if tok wit u,u will be vry frust on me d izit??
bt..if i din tok..i suffer here...:(

God~~dunola...wat shud i do?? wat can i do??

~~Maria~~(*.*)

~After de WAITIN~

2009-04-18T02:37:00.000-07:00

I realy so stupid wait for ur cal til midnite..whn i cal u..u din answer..whn i msg..u din reply..i jus Wait~

Ther's is no answer from u even whn i went 2sleep..b4 i sleep i sent a msg to ask u out ystrdy..bt u din reply..

I wait til de nxt dy mornin tat is ystrdy..no reply from u..i cal so so so many time..cal til lik my hp low batt..no single word from u..
I hav to find ur fren n ask them how r u..wher u..
Thy tel me ur car spoil..i so worry..bt..u din even answer my cal..
Thy oso tel me u went club ystrdy nite..haih..
If i say..u sure say me i can go,bt u canot go..say i nt fair treat u lidat..
Bt whn i go i tel u,did u tel me..no!!i cal u jus dun1 answer..
Den i ask u ystrdy nite..u tel me u dakei sumur 1bluff me..y la dear..y?izit u 1our relationship is full of lies..ther's no security in it..i trusted u..y muz u bluff me..haih..i worry u til i almost went to subang to find u..i jus tot can spend my off day wit u,cos u finish ur exam d..bt..it jus another same old day without u..

Den 2dy..ur coll gt event..i realy tot i can go wit u to hav fun..i even ask for leave..n oso cal u earlier,Again!din answer my cal..den tel me u on highway d..i cal u tat time mayb u saw..den u dun1 let me follow den dun1 answer my cal...cos ystrdy i ask u,u wish me can go ma?u say as i lik..realy sad to hear it..if last time u sure say "i so wish my dear can go"..haih..duno la..

Mayb u realy hate me so much for keep on 1follow u..u rather wit ur fren than wit me..tats wat i thk..my perception..bt i duno hw u thk..cos whn i ask u always reply me den,so,hw,haih..tis few answer..i can even answer for u..

Wat u 1me to do to gain back ur faith on me?
Wat u expect from me sumur?
I d giv u de time n space u needed..
I noe its my fault to go club without u last time..i realy insaf..
I promised u..tat i wont go without u anymore..n i realy din go..mayb u feel tat i wil bluff u again ba..haih..
Bt whn u go,u oso nvr tel..
Izit u 1me die d,den oni u wil trust me?

I hate our situation nw..it seems lik ther's a great wall between us..i realy duno hw long can i stand b4 i can break de wall..

Haih..duno la..heartache..
So tired me 2dy..jus went for 3class continuously..3hours continuously..at least i gt de swt out of me..can slim o..hehe..

Pray al de best wil happen 2our relationship n my work..

~Maria~(+.+)

WaIT

2009-04-16T06:40:00.000-07:00

Today is ur last day exam...i dun even noe wat time u exam finish..
and after ur exam u din even giv me a call or msg..its such a heartache..
juz nw i cal u..u answer n say juz after finish play ball..n say wil msg me ltr..
will u??i duno..v'll c ltr..

y muz u b so cruel n delete our pic in ur frenster...haih~~
u make me feel lik i'm nt part of u anymore...y muz u do tat...
y cant v juz lik other couple b happy whn v're together..
haih~~my heart ache nw..whn i mention bout hw u treat me..
A person who so love me in de past would let me suffer lidat in de present...

God bless me to b strong!!plS!!
I thk i almost wan sick jor..haih..whole day feel cold n headache...:<

Maria ~_~

~YoU'rè My EVERYTHING~(-)

2009-04-15T05:55:00.000-07:00

I thought i can forget for wat u done 2hurt me..cos i love u..
I thought tat i can realy forgive u bcos i care for u..
I thought of never wantin 2let u go,cos i jus wanna b wit u..
I thought n give u de space n time u needed..
I thought tat after all i thought to give u,
We can start it all over again live happily ever after...

But now seems lik i'm wrong..
Now oni i noe tat everything is jus my empty hope..
Jus my own perception..
Jus~Only me who want to cont tis relationship~~
Jus oni me tat appreciate you..
Jus me ownself thk tat v'll b beta after al de barrier v past..
Am i right?
I dun have al de answer to de question i ask..
Cos u never want to tel me when i ask..

You confuse me wit your acts,
You make me feel lik i'm alone although i have you..
You make me feel lik i'm jus a Burden for u..
Our title is lik a couple..but our relationship is jus lik a fren..
I tot i can cope wit it..cos i thk tis relationship stil can b save,
bt act i cant..
It brokes my heart into pieces when i saw our pic,
Saw our notes,
Saw our meeting place,
Saw our msgs,
Heard our songs..
Thk of wat u said 2me b4,
Thk of de promises u make 2me,
All of thos small little thgs tat remind me of us~~

U told me u 1freedom,bt i nvr restrict u 2hav it..
I nvr ask u 2b wit me 24/7,
Instead its hard 4us 2meet also although v jus stay near each other..
U 1na b "Alone" is wat u tel me whn u wan to leave me..
Its heartache whn i heard u tel me tat...

I wanted to b ur shelter when u feel unsafe out ther,
I wanted to borrow u my shoulder when u nid it,
I wanted to giv u a big warm hug when u realy stress,
I wanted to jus b ur listener when u nid sum1 to tok to..
All i ever wanted is to giv u EVERYTHING i can do for u when i'm not by ur side..
But u dun even 1na giv me a chance to do it..

I jus ask for a simple request..
Jus wan u to care for me a little bit more..
Jus ask u to love me a little bit more..
Jus include me in ur life..
For de reason I realy do love u,n u stil care for me...
I dun1 jus bcos of sum stupid reason,v let go tis relationship
Tat used 2b treasured by both of us...
Tat used to b keepin alot of sweet memories inside...
Tat used to b jus for us...
Jus for de reason tat your love is my everything...

I love you my dear~~
Never once u're out of my heart although v were apart...

Love,
Maria..(~_~,)

~STORMY HEART No SUNSHINE AT ALL~

2009-04-11T03:53:00.000-07:00

My heart feel so heavy,so dark til i barely can breath..barely can take it up..ther's no sunshine..or sumone tat can cheer my heart up..realy very heavy..lik something pulling it from de bottom..

Jus now i went for spinning class at my club,de instructor on a song by Blue title if you come back,.i heard tat song d..my heart..realy jus cryin inside.,even i did shed a few tears..i keep thkin..izit i realy did wrong in de past..til dear cant b lik last time lidat?i realy jus keep thkin..thkin n thkin..

I jus can say.,i wil try my best to give dear de time n space dear need..i und tat nxt week is dear de final in last sem d..i und ur stress tat u go thru..forgive me if during tis time i disturb u..bt i jus tot want u to release ur stress for awhile..

I dedicate lee hom song title EVERYTHING to dear..hope tat dear can gt out of ur stress..dear..from de moment v together til now.,i already put you in my heart til now n you're my everything..

Wish dear al de best in ur final..miss ya here all de time..

Love, ♥
Maria..(-_-,)

~GlOoMy DaY~

2009-04-09T06:18:00.000-07:00

Today..realy no mood 1na do anythg..even at work i jus sit down n on9..din even make cal from de moment i work til nw..why?

I feel so down 2dy..cos of dear again..ystrdy.,i went 2kl.,i even pack my thg n tot cumback tat time can stay at dear hs de..whn i at coll tat time..so hope de time faster past n i can meet dear de..at last..de interview over..i rush to lrt 2catch up de 1st train..while inside.,i jus keep thk dear..hope 2c u soon,my heart was so happy at 1st.Tot dear wil b happy 2saw me..

Bt after de call i made 2u..i oni found out..act u nt tat 1na c me de..i duno whether is tis is oni my thkin alone..percept dear lidat..dear say ltr u gt clas den gt play ball sumur..say scare i boring..i noe..bt it doesnt matter to me..realy..cos wat i nid is jus c dear..whn de moment dear say ask me go back..stil gt nxt time..my heart realy jus drop..smile is nt in my face anymore..bt jus tears fallin down..dear say til lik i go ther realy annoyin 4u..say til lik i realy wil disturb u do ur thg..keep ask me back home no matter hw much i tel dear i jus realy 1c him..den i realy dun1 let dear noe i cry,ltr u dun lik den i jus off de phone..

Dear msg me say scare i borin..den i jus try al my best 2thk positive n try 2reply dear in happy mode..bt dear jus reply me 2msg..den at nite 7sumthg..i msg dear ask him 2careful whn ply ball..dear say din ply d..den i jus say if i noe den i go find dear,bt dear say nvrmind..haih.. Den i say la,if last time dear sure disappointed de,if cant c me..dear jus haih..ask me dun lidat.. Den i try to b happy by askin dear send me a bubble msg jus say i miss u..is tat hard..bt u gv me reason..say u duno..say u 1na sleep.,u straight away tel me la..dun1,at least i wont so hurt..bt u say u 1na nap til msg me oso din hv at nite..lik 1na avoid wat i askin u 2do...haih..dun thk i stupid la k..tat time oni wat time..7sumthg u tel me u 1sleep..den..nonit wake up eat a?bath a?

I duno wats tat means..bt i jus noe it realy hurts for me..whn u do lidat..

Frens ask me 2jus b patient..if i do love u..yes.,i do love dear..bt my heart is oso fragile..hw long can i stand lidat..v've been together for 6dys d..since last fri after our lenjing time..bt til nw.,i stil feel tat ur nt wit me,.haih..dear..i~realy duno wat 2say d..my heart jus feel so down..al i ask is jus tat u care for me a little more..2dy..1msg oso dear din send me.,i jus cal u in de mornin..

Dear..ur final cumin..pls study hard k..wish dear al de best..so bad tis mth dear de final fall on 13th..cant celebrate wit u..

Wish dear pass wit flying colors in ur last sem..

Love,
Maria-shadowfax

ღ ~~WHAT I HAVE TO SAY~~ ღ

~~Ran in2 HIM~~